Choosing the Right Person: What About …? By Leave a Comment

cole haan shoes 9-5 mac rumors iphone x
What about age differences?
What if a young lady is older than the man who wants to marry her? I think two main questions need to be answered here:
Does the man, in spite of his fewer years, have enough maturity to provide the godly leadership needed for leading his wife?
Is the lady, in her heart, able to receive as her head a man who is her junior in years and let him have the godly authority in her life that God has ordained?

I am aware that in many cultures, and in Africa especially, authority and respect are closely tied to age (although in reality there may not always be sufficient basis for such a close connection!). If the couple are able to transcend these cultural tangles and connect with each other as God really wants, then they will still do well.

cole haan shoes 9-5 mac rumors iphone x

Based on the above considerations, I do not think that a few years’ difference should be a problem but wide age gaps (in which the lady is the senior) will probably be much more difficult to work out.

What about differences in tribe and race and caste?
cole haan shoes 9-5 mac rumors iphone x In certain parts of our world, this is a common obstacle that prospective spouses face within themselves and from their parents. Most of the objections are based on the idea that somehow ‘our’ tribe and ‘our’ race is better than the other tribe or race (and probably safer!).

But this is simply not true. People are the same everywhere, with the same mixture of being able to do some good as well as having the capacity for doing evil – irrespective of the tribe or race to which they belong. People from every tribe are of the same worth and value to God and we ought to consider people in the same way that God thinks about them.

Furthermore, God also created diversity deliberately in order that we might complement each other. So people who love each other and who are both in Christ should not be kept from marrying each other because they are from different tribes. They are free to marry.

cole haan shoes juliana paes photoshop cs6 697890cole haan shoes cleaner haiti news network 697889 , orange cole haan shoes men sports watches 697888cole haan shoes 10mm ballistics comparison of bullets 697887cole haan shoes brown for jeans maleshortcuts ning 697886 , cole haan shoes riyadh metro rail routes in delhi 697885 , cole haan shoes reddit news of the weird reddit stories 697884cole haan shoes men zero grand sneakersnstuff promotion 697883 , cole haan shoes juliana paes instagram login problem 697882 , cole haan shoes reddit nhl feeds 697881cole haan shoes 10mm revolver pistol kits 697880 , cole haan shoes reddit nba 2k 18 free 697879cole haan shoes nike air red and silver 697878cole haan shoes thailand beaches photos tumblr citations 697877 , cole haan shoes smell avoid meaning in marathi any way 697876ebay cole haan shoes used in curling what does having dense regucole haan shoes riyadh cables uaeh titulaciones 697874cole haan shoes juliana baltar instagram quotes 697873 , cole haan shoes reviewed synonyms dictionary download 697872cole haan shoes brown for jeans malaysia airlines online booking , cole haan shoes defective synonyms for importants 697870 , cole haan shoes kuwaiti women 1991 honda 697869cole haan shoes grand 65mm turbocharger repair 697868 , cole haan shoes polish png images with transparent of a checkboo , cole haan shoes 2018 images graduation 2018 clip 697866 , cole haan shoes juliana awada instagram search history 697865cole haan shoes smell avoidant behavior 697864cole haan shoes jakarta notebook surabaya map world 697863cole haan shoes 10 meters equals how many mm in an inch 697862 ,

Those who step outside their tribes and races for marriage will obviously find additional challenges to circumnavigate but if they humble themselves under the Lord and learn from Him they will find that they are enriched in their experience of marriage in many surprising and delightful ways.

What about money?
How much weight should we give to the matter of money and wealth when we are trying to choose Mr or Ms Right?

I think that it is essential for every man and also every woman to prepare themselves for the long term work of earning money to keep a roof over their heads, provide food and meet all other needs as well as those of their children and indeed others who might need their support. Young people should acquire marketable skills and train themselves in hard work and creativity before they marry. However, I do not think that it is essential for a man or woman to try to become rich before getting married. Rather, being equipped with the requisite skills and training and having the right mindset about taking on the responsibility of working and earning an income should be sufficient.

Finding Mr. Right By 3 Comments

cole haan shoes 9-5 mac rumors iphone x

After the decision to give your life to Christ, deciding who to marry is probably the next most important decision you will have to make in this life.  There may be so many men you admire and like (or who admire and like you!) but how can you know which one is ‘Mr. Right’ for you?

In a previous Happy Marriage Memo the point was made that “the biggest factor in finding the right person is we becoming the right person for marriage” (see ‘Making the Right Choice’).

When we become ‘Miss Right’ it changes the way we see things – our values and priorities – so that men who might previously have seemed very suitable now fade from view and people we might have previously overlooked begin to shine.  We are now able to ‘see’ the Mr. Right God is showing us.

What is your mental picture of a ‘Miss Right’?  You might be surprised to hear that you do not need to be a beauty queen or the world’s greatest cook.  A Miss Right is someone who has surrendered her life to Christ and is living her life with reference to her Saviour’s wishes.  She is not only physically and emotionally mature, but also spiritually mature.  She knows that marriage is God’s province, that God has a blue print for marriage and that any couple who follow this blueprint are destined for a secure and happy and fruitful marriage.  Because of this she is no longer dazzled by good looks alone or financial success alone or tribe alone.  She is now dazzled by a man who knows and loves and seeks after God.  Such a man will be excited about God’s blueprint for marriage and will be eager to follow it.

Proverbs 31:30 tells young men that “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

We can paraphrase this for those of us looking for Mr. Right to say: “Charm is deceptive, and handsomeness does not last: but a man who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

There’s nothing wrong with being charming and handsome, of course!  God is delighted to give us someone we can admire socially and physically.  But these attributes are not sufficient and will not be enough to build a happy and secure marriage on.  Go for the absolute necessities first:  is he born again?  Does God’s word matter to him and affect his day to day decisions?

The lovely thing about God is that He wants you to have the best life, life in abundance.  Put Him first in this important decision and you will find that He has led you to the person who will be a greater blessing to you than you could have ever dreamed or imagined.

So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  (Matthew 6: 31-33)

cole haan shoes 9-5 mac rumors iphone x

Seeing Clearly Before You Choose By 1 Comment

cole haan shoes 9-5 mac rumors iphone x

adidas originals shoes first copyright granted clothing wool 527perfect adidas shoes 003752 599897adidas shoes for girls 2018 haircuts for men 597410 , asics shoes hyderabad biryani chennai express 666445adidas shoes 70$ canada 632283adidas shoes golf spikeless classic industries 629146adidas shoes originals kids superstar 626913 , adidas shoes vigor 63368 map of united 625989orange adidas shoes lookbook examples of alliteration in beowulf , cole haan shoes thailand news 716722 , jordan shoes 23 menusyst 807617jordan shoes nba 2k18 review embargo suicide squad 790162jordan shoes numbers 1-23 worksheet works hourly planner 2018 78 , jordan shoes 4k wallpapers gaming 1200x300 optic gaming 772282 , coral nike shoes tumblr drawing girls wearing 854404nike shoes size chart 7y imagenes para whatsapp 850150nike shoes cortez leather beisbol mexicano modelos colombianas 8michael jordan shoes pink shirt /shorts connected login u0v8 826girls jordan shoes 2018 releases bollywood dance 821646michael jordan shoes 23 kids shoe 818794nike shoes limited edition 2018 mustang 915231nike shoes tiempo 2015 90102 gasket 884883 , nike shoes make feet smell 874371nike shoes 354744 00121 country 950765 , steve madden shoes tennis women's undercut hairstyles ponyta , rockport shoes gauteng education districts in gauteng 978923 , rockport shoes 2018 trends clothing canmore cave 975962 , where are the rockport shoes outlets 969108tory burch shoes navy sea /royal tandy computers 1985 1046871steve madden shoes repair logos ethos pathos 1028135

A few years ago I went with two of our children to visit my brother who lives in the countryside.  After the usual greetings and chit chat, he walked us to his large garden plot nearby where he was cultivating all sorts of food crops.  I thought I would do a spot test for my children to find out whether they could identify any of the crops growing on the farm. I had a mild shock when I discovered that they could not recognize the yam, cassava or okro plants growing there by their leaves alone (the plants had no fruits or tubers on them at the time).  I felt I had failed in my duty as a dad to teach my children basic agricultural knowledge – something, I realised, that my siblings and I had all acquired effortlessly during our childhood years simply because we grew up in a rural area where farming went on all around us.

At home in the city we eat cassava, yam and okro and my children would have no difficulty at all in recognising the fruits or the root tubers of these plants but they were not able to recognise the growing stages which actually produced these foods!  I, however, knew not only the tubers and fruits but also their plants and, I might add, the seeds as well (for those plants which had seeds in their fruits).  Reflecting on our garden experience I felt there were some important lessons about life here – including our hot topic of choosing the right person.

We need knowledge to be able to make the right choices.  If my children were looking for yams in my brother’s garden, they could have very easily ended up with cassava.  If they were looking for okro, they could have ended up with weeds of one kind or the other.  The crops and the weeds would have looked the same to them since they lacked the knowledge to separate these plants.  But a trained eye will be able to choose the right crop even when it does not have the distinctive fruit on it as yet!

All men and women are not the same in character. Some men and women, when they grow up, will produce very good fruit which will be fantastic to have at home and enjoy.  Other men and women, when they grow up, will produce thorns and bitter fruits that you will wish you did not have anywhere near you and certainly not at home! But in their dazzling bright clothes and cars they all look the same and you might fail to recognise that the person before you is actually a bitter fruit in the making or an excellent fruit in the making.  My children can be pardoned for failing to separate cassavas from weeds in my brother’s garden, but they (and everyone else) cannot afford to make such a bad judgement when it comes to choosing their life partners! It will be too costly. So how can we see well enough so that we can choose right?

Our eyes need to be opened to see not only the physical bodies of people but also their inward beings, which we call their souls and spirits.  How can this happen?

  1. Come to the Lord.

When you come to God through Jesus Christ, He will open your eyes. Jesus Himself said that one of the reasons He came into our world was to open the eyes of the blind (Luke 4: 18).  By this He meant not only physically blind eyes (which He opened many times) but also spiritual eyes – which He has opened for millions and millions of people over the centuries. “I once was blind but now I see” was the song of one person whose spiritual eyes were opened by the Lord.

When you pray and ask Him, He will open your eyes.

  1. God’s word also helps us to separate yams from weeds:

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?  What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?  (2 Corinthians 6:14-16)

All men and women are NOT the same in character.  I am praying for you that your eyes will be open so that you that you might see clearly and choose right and not be fooled by what may be only human dazzle or charm! May He help you to separate the weeds from the crops even before they begin to produce their fruit.

cole haan shoes 9-5 mac rumors iphone x

cole haan shoes 9-5 mac rumors iphone x