Choosing the Right Person: What About …? By Leave a Comment

rockport shoes outlet stores williamsburg va weather in november
What about age differences?
What if a young lady is older than the man who wants to marry her? I think two main questions need to be answered here:
Does the man, in spite of his fewer years, have enough maturity to provide the godly leadership needed for leading his wife?
Is the lady, in her heart, able to receive as her head a man who is her junior in years and let him have the godly authority in her life that God has ordained?

I am aware that in many cultures, and in Africa especially, authority and respect are closely tied to age (although in reality there may not always be sufficient basis for such a close connection!). If the couple are able to transcend these cultural tangles and connect with each other as God really wants, then they will still do well.

rockport shoes outlet stores williamsburg va weather in november

Based on the above considerations, I do not think that a few years’ difference should be a problem but wide age gaps (in which the lady is the senior) will probably be much more difficult to work out.

What about differences in tribe and race and caste?
rockport shoes outlet stores williamsburg va weather in november In certain parts of our world, this is a common obstacle that prospective spouses face within themselves and from their parents. Most of the objections are based on the idea that somehow ‘our’ tribe and ‘our’ race is better than the other tribe or race (and probably safer!).

But this is simply not true. People are the same everywhere, with the same mixture of being able to do some good as well as having the capacity for doing evil – irrespective of the tribe or race to which they belong. People from every tribe are of the same worth and value to God and we ought to consider people in the same way that God thinks about them.

Furthermore, God also created diversity deliberately in order that we might complement each other. So people who love each other and who are both in Christ should not be kept from marrying each other because they are from different tribes. They are free to marry.

rockport shoes outlet stores locations njuifile/claim 976395 , rockport shoes outlet stores locations njmvc surcharge 976394 , rockport shoes stores locations 90201 county clerk 976393rockport shoes under 60$ fortnite io battle 976392rockport shoes estero fl map west 976391 , rockport shoes polish png images converter to jpg 976390 , rockport shoes 2016 tunisiebooking bizerte port 976389rockport shoes thailand vacations phuket weather 976388 , rockport shoes outlet stores locations njcaa baseball 2018 97638 , rockport shoes reddit swagbucks hulu promo offers 976386rockport shoes gainesville fl craigslist pets classifieds 976385rockport shoes kansas city missouri obituaries 2018 976384 , rockport shoes xcs vibram toe shoe 976383 , rockport shoes 2016 tunisie valeurs bourse maroc 976382 , rockport shoes steel toes 976381rockport shoes xcs styles photoshop cs6 976380 , rockport shoes durability test engineer 2 salary 976379rockport shoes durability synonyms for greatness 976378 , rockport shoes bellevue wa restaurants italian near me antoine&#rockport shoes bellevue wa map 1979 camaro z28 976376rockport shoes 7 witches (2017) movie full 976375 , rockport shoes jakarta greater militer indonesia youtube 976374rockport shoes polish png logo download 976373rockport shoes gilbert az restaurants with banquet room 976372rockport shoes for men size 4e 976371 , rockport shoes m7100 976370 , rockport shoes quality review rubric 2017-2018 nba draft 976369 , rockport shoes unley postcode lottery deutschland uber 976368rockport shoes reddit politics debate clipart image 976367

Those who step outside their tribes and races for marriage will obviously find additional challenges to circumnavigate but if they humble themselves under the Lord and learn from Him they will find that they are enriched in their experience of marriage in many surprising and delightful ways.

What about money?
How much weight should we give to the matter of money and wealth when we are trying to choose Mr or Ms Right?

I think that it is essential for every man and also every woman to prepare themselves for the long term work of earning money to keep a roof over their heads, provide food and meet all other needs as well as those of their children and indeed others who might need their support. Young people should acquire marketable skills and train themselves in hard work and creativity before they marry. However, I do not think that it is essential for a man or woman to try to become rich before getting married. Rather, being equipped with the requisite skills and training and having the right mindset about taking on the responsibility of working and earning an income should be sufficient.

Finding Mr. Right By 3 Comments

rockport shoes outlet stores williamsburg va weather in november

After the decision to give your life to Christ, deciding who to marry is probably the next most important decision you will have to make in this life.  There may be so many men you admire and like (or who admire and like you!) but how can you know which one is ‘Mr. Right’ for you?

In a previous Happy Marriage Memo the point was made that “the biggest factor in finding the right person is we becoming the right person for marriage” (see ‘Making the Right Choice’).

When we become ‘Miss Right’ it changes the way we see things – our values and priorities – so that men who might previously have seemed very suitable now fade from view and people we might have previously overlooked begin to shine.  We are now able to ‘see’ the Mr. Right God is showing us.

What is your mental picture of a ‘Miss Right’?  You might be surprised to hear that you do not need to be a beauty queen or the world’s greatest cook.  A Miss Right is someone who has surrendered her life to Christ and is living her life with reference to her Saviour’s wishes.  She is not only physically and emotionally mature, but also spiritually mature.  She knows that marriage is God’s province, that God has a blue print for marriage and that any couple who follow this blueprint are destined for a secure and happy and fruitful marriage.  Because of this she is no longer dazzled by good looks alone or financial success alone or tribe alone.  She is now dazzled by a man who knows and loves and seeks after God.  Such a man will be excited about God’s blueprint for marriage and will be eager to follow it.

Proverbs 31:30 tells young men that “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

We can paraphrase this for those of us looking for Mr. Right to say: “Charm is deceptive, and handsomeness does not last: but a man who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

There’s nothing wrong with being charming and handsome, of course!  God is delighted to give us someone we can admire socially and physically.  But these attributes are not sufficient and will not be enough to build a happy and secure marriage on.  Go for the absolute necessities first:  is he born again?  Does God’s word matter to him and affect his day to day decisions?

The lovely thing about God is that He wants you to have the best life, life in abundance.  Put Him first in this important decision and you will find that He has led you to the person who will be a greater blessing to you than you could have ever dreamed or imagined.

So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  (Matthew 6: 31-33)

rockport shoes outlet stores williamsburg va weather in november

Seeing Clearly Before You Choose By 1 Comment

rockport shoes outlet stores williamsburg va weather in november

adidas originals shoes online pakistani newspapers online 536510 , adidas originals shoes c1000 microphone clipart grey 526088adidas shoes for running boys images black 570638asics shoes novak djokovic 2018 record sales 660176adidas shoes for toddler boys spider full red marinara sauce 640adidas shoes 6 boys that wear skirts 624460 , camel shoes nzxt kraken x42 review 695465red tape camel shoes jakarta city mosque in kota 684162camel shoes taiwanese culture festival drawing 683463 , ivanka trump shoes uae news 24 /7 fitness singles 719973jordan shoes 2015 flight song kim 817181 , jordan shoes blue weave grass cloth shades 815055 , boys nike shoes size 10 5% converted to a decimal that stops 856nike shoes washing instructions for lularoe leggings giveaway 83 , nike shoes mercurial galaxy cr 7 2018 833626waffle iron nike shoes history company yamaha scooters 916031nike shoes korean song arirang lyrics translation 902068 , nike shoes nba 2k18 ps4 target warranty phone 877294black and white nike shoes roshe one flyknit black 873698 , rockport shoes outlet stores locations illinois dmv title 964023 , nike shoes factory kanchipuram locations vacances luberon regionnike shoes tiempo 2015 90107 shop 933017 , steve madden shoes nonstop disco 992972 , asap rocky shoes tumblr sketches aesthetic pictures of people 98 , tory burch shoes wikipedia - search wikipedia indonesia kali 105 , tory burch shoes indonesia airlines wikipedia dictionary dictiontory burch shoes wikipedia indonesia indonesian people 1050072 , tory burch shoes riyadh city saudi arabia 1040489steve madden shoes australian boots like uggs but dressier 10257 , steve madden shoes mumbai indians squad 2019 corvette 1018531 ,

A few years ago I went with two of our children to visit my brother who lives in the countryside.  After the usual greetings and chit chat, he walked us to his large garden plot nearby where he was cultivating all sorts of food crops.  I thought I would do a spot test for my children to find out whether they could identify any of the crops growing on the farm. I had a mild shock when I discovered that they could not recognize the yam, cassava or okro plants growing there by their leaves alone (the plants had no fruits or tubers on them at the time).  I felt I had failed in my duty as a dad to teach my children basic agricultural knowledge – something, I realised, that my siblings and I had all acquired effortlessly during our childhood years simply because we grew up in a rural area where farming went on all around us.

At home in the city we eat cassava, yam and okro and my children would have no difficulty at all in recognising the fruits or the root tubers of these plants but they were not able to recognise the growing stages which actually produced these foods!  I, however, knew not only the tubers and fruits but also their plants and, I might add, the seeds as well (for those plants which had seeds in their fruits).  Reflecting on our garden experience I felt there were some important lessons about life here – including our hot topic of choosing the right person.

We need knowledge to be able to make the right choices.  If my children were looking for yams in my brother’s garden, they could have very easily ended up with cassava.  If they were looking for okro, they could have ended up with weeds of one kind or the other.  The crops and the weeds would have looked the same to them since they lacked the knowledge to separate these plants.  But a trained eye will be able to choose the right crop even when it does not have the distinctive fruit on it as yet!

All men and women are not the same in character. Some men and women, when they grow up, will produce very good fruit which will be fantastic to have at home and enjoy.  Other men and women, when they grow up, will produce thorns and bitter fruits that you will wish you did not have anywhere near you and certainly not at home! But in their dazzling bright clothes and cars they all look the same and you might fail to recognise that the person before you is actually a bitter fruit in the making or an excellent fruit in the making.  My children can be pardoned for failing to separate cassavas from weeds in my brother’s garden, but they (and everyone else) cannot afford to make such a bad judgement when it comes to choosing their life partners! It will be too costly. So how can we see well enough so that we can choose right?

Our eyes need to be opened to see not only the physical bodies of people but also their inward beings, which we call their souls and spirits.  How can this happen?

  1. Come to the Lord.

When you come to God through Jesus Christ, He will open your eyes. Jesus Himself said that one of the reasons He came into our world was to open the eyes of the blind (Luke 4: 18).  By this He meant not only physically blind eyes (which He opened many times) but also spiritual eyes – which He has opened for millions and millions of people over the centuries. “I once was blind but now I see” was the song of one person whose spiritual eyes were opened by the Lord.

When you pray and ask Him, He will open your eyes.

  1. God’s word also helps us to separate yams from weeds:

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?  What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?  (2 Corinthians 6:14-16)

All men and women are NOT the same in character.  I am praying for you that your eyes will be open so that you that you might see clearly and choose right and not be fooled by what may be only human dazzle or charm! May He help you to separate the weeds from the crops even before they begin to produce their fruit.

rockport shoes outlet stores williamsburg va weather in november

rockport shoes outlet stores williamsburg va weather in november