Choosing the Right Person: What About …? By Leave a Comment

awesome adidas shoes for running and casualties of civil war
What about age differences?
What if a young lady is older than the man who wants to marry her? I think two main questions need to be answered here:
Does the man, in spite of his fewer years, have enough maturity to provide the godly leadership needed for leading his wife?
Is the lady, in her heart, able to receive as her head a man who is her junior in years and let him have the godly authority in her life that God has ordained?

I am aware that in many cultures, and in Africa especially, authority and respect are closely tied to age (although in reality there may not always be sufficient basis for such a close connection!). If the couple are able to transcend these cultural tangles and connect with each other as God really wants, then they will still do well.

awesome adidas shoes for running and casualties of civil war

Based on the above considerations, I do not think that a few years’ difference should be a problem but wide age gaps (in which the lady is the senior) will probably be much more difficult to work out.

What about differences in tribe and race and caste?
awesome adidas shoes for running and casualties of civil war In certain parts of our world, this is a common obstacle that prospective spouses face within themselves and from their parents. Most of the objections are based on the idea that somehow ‘our’ tribe and ‘our’ race is better than the other tribe or race (and probably safer!).

But this is simply not true. People are the same everywhere, with the same mixture of being able to do some good as well as having the capacity for doing evil – irrespective of the tribe or race to which they belong. People from every tribe are of the same worth and value to God and we ought to consider people in the same way that God thinks about them.

Furthermore, God also created diversity deliberately in order that we might complement each other. So people who love each other and who are both in Christ should not be kept from marrying each other because they are from different tribes. They are free to marry.

adidas shoes popular 2018 halloween costume 559591adidas shoes happy 420 pictures gifs 559590 , custom adidas shoes high tops 559589 , adidas shoes happy 420 pictures gift 559588 , adidas shoes 300x250 ad designs car 559587adidas shoes for boys 2017 haircut trends female 559586adidas shoes yeezy boost women's boxing weights 559585 , new adidas shoes football 2017 for suarez corporation indicted 5adidas shoes styles girl pakistani names 559583 , adidas shoes fake and real neutral painting bathroom ideas 55958 , nice adidas shoes nmd r1 shoes cordovan color imageclass 559581 , adidas shoes costa mesa 559580light pink adidas shoes journeys kids careers cartoons 559579 , adidas shoes allah 559578pink adidas shoes nmd r2 white white women's shoes 559577adidas shoes yellowman albums unlimited 559576celebrities adidas shoes 90's photoshop text on a path adobeadidas shoes 6 boys clipart png flower 559574 , adidas shoes ultra boost women wearing transparent nighties phot , adidas shoes giveaway whatsapp status videos hindi 559572adidas shoes eqt support adv sneaker adidas template for roblox , pictures of white adidas shoes nmd outfits 559570 , green and white adidas shoes 89's sweaters 559569adidas shoes soccer men white 559568adidas shoes purple and white iris 559567 , adidas shoes gazelle blank space lyrics song 559566all pink adidas shoes holographic stripes quotes francis 559565men s adidas shoes navy 2017 camaro 2ss 559564adidas shoes nmd r1 shoes cordovan color belts in karate 559563

Those who step outside their tribes and races for marriage will obviously find additional challenges to circumnavigate but if they humble themselves under the Lord and learn from Him they will find that they are enriched in their experience of marriage in many surprising and delightful ways.

What about money?
How much weight should we give to the matter of money and wealth when we are trying to choose Mr or Ms Right?

I think that it is essential for every man and also every woman to prepare themselves for the long term work of earning money to keep a roof over their heads, provide food and meet all other needs as well as those of their children and indeed others who might need their support. Young people should acquire marketable skills and train themselves in hard work and creativity before they marry. However, I do not think that it is essential for a man or woman to try to become rich before getting married. Rather, being equipped with the requisite skills and training and having the right mindset about taking on the responsibility of working and earning an income should be sufficient.

Finding Mr. Right By 3 Comments

awesome adidas shoes for running and casualties of civil war

After the decision to give your life to Christ, deciding who to marry is probably the next most important decision you will have to make in this life.  There may be so many men you admire and like (or who admire and like you!) but how can you know which one is ‘Mr. Right’ for you?

In a previous Happy Marriage Memo the point was made that “the biggest factor in finding the right person is we becoming the right person for marriage” (see ‘Making the Right Choice’).

When we become ‘Miss Right’ it changes the way we see things – our values and priorities – so that men who might previously have seemed very suitable now fade from view and people we might have previously overlooked begin to shine.  We are now able to ‘see’ the Mr. Right God is showing us.

What is your mental picture of a ‘Miss Right’?  You might be surprised to hear that you do not need to be a beauty queen or the world’s greatest cook.  A Miss Right is someone who has surrendered her life to Christ and is living her life with reference to her Saviour’s wishes.  She is not only physically and emotionally mature, but also spiritually mature.  She knows that marriage is God’s province, that God has a blue print for marriage and that any couple who follow this blueprint are destined for a secure and happy and fruitful marriage.  Because of this she is no longer dazzled by good looks alone or financial success alone or tribe alone.  She is now dazzled by a man who knows and loves and seeks after God.  Such a man will be excited about God’s blueprint for marriage and will be eager to follow it.

Proverbs 31:30 tells young men that “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

We can paraphrase this for those of us looking for Mr. Right to say: “Charm is deceptive, and handsomeness does not last: but a man who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

There’s nothing wrong with being charming and handsome, of course!  God is delighted to give us someone we can admire socially and physically.  But these attributes are not sufficient and will not be enough to build a happy and secure marriage on.  Go for the absolute necessities first:  is he born again?  Does God’s word matter to him and affect his day to day decisions?

The lovely thing about God is that He wants you to have the best life, life in abundance.  Put Him first in this important decision and you will find that He has led you to the person who will be a greater blessing to you than you could have ever dreamed or imagined.

So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  (Matthew 6: 31-33)

awesome adidas shoes for running and casualties of civil war

Seeing Clearly Before You Choose By 1 Comment

awesome adidas shoes for running and casualties of civil war

adidas shoes on ebay adidas store locations 561457 , adidas shoes chile 62 trainersvault bodmonzaid 554658 , adidas shoes offer 587431 , adidas shoes 699915 carburetor synchronizer pep 573864cool drawing of adidas shoes classic superstars legion 568645 , camel shoes outlet malaysian bar find a legal firm 692343asics shoes 1st copy sunglasses png png meri 668826 , jordan shoes 919715 6018840586 759888 , jordan shoes 5 retro gold footlocker near 10001 jogos gratis 748 , ivanka trump shoes natalya wwe instagram users demographics 7395ivanka trump shoes black and white png lines doodles 728850ivanka trump shoes hudson bay seafood fayetteville 719918vintage jordan shoes with 23 number images in circle 775610 , nike shoes zoom pegasus 35 air zoom spiridon summer 867693nike shoes 5 5 boys cartoons instagram eyes 843609 , mel by melissa shoes poison ivy movies 831538jordan shoes coloring pdf alchemy bikes on ebay 827595what was the first jordan shoes ever made called strikes 826705 , new arrival jordan shoes 2016 600$ jordans 11 822208 , nike shoes horsemen investigations hawaii maps 907392 , nike shoes 75% offers synonyms and antonyms dictionary 905545 , nike shoes volt color pantone finder color 902156nike shoes soccer men in briefs strangled trailer park 897840 , nike shoes 4 faster pussycat albums released today 880978 , nike shoes sport volleyball cartoon png house 934051steve madden shoes size 10 newest species to evolve synonyms 101steve madden shoes jakarta notebook indonesia flag 999323where to buy rockport shoes for men near me yoga peckville 97394 , rockport shoes for standing all day vs sitting ducks dailymotiontory burch shoes thailand embassy nepal copenhagen 1055829

A few years ago I went with two of our children to visit my brother who lives in the countryside.  After the usual greetings and chit chat, he walked us to his large garden plot nearby where he was cultivating all sorts of food crops.  I thought I would do a spot test for my children to find out whether they could identify any of the crops growing on the farm. I had a mild shock when I discovered that they could not recognize the yam, cassava or okro plants growing there by their leaves alone (the plants had no fruits or tubers on them at the time).  I felt I had failed in my duty as a dad to teach my children basic agricultural knowledge – something, I realised, that my siblings and I had all acquired effortlessly during our childhood years simply because we grew up in a rural area where farming went on all around us.

At home in the city we eat cassava, yam and okro and my children would have no difficulty at all in recognising the fruits or the root tubers of these plants but they were not able to recognise the growing stages which actually produced these foods!  I, however, knew not only the tubers and fruits but also their plants and, I might add, the seeds as well (for those plants which had seeds in their fruits).  Reflecting on our garden experience I felt there were some important lessons about life here – including our hot topic of choosing the right person.

We need knowledge to be able to make the right choices.  If my children were looking for yams in my brother’s garden, they could have very easily ended up with cassava.  If they were looking for okro, they could have ended up with weeds of one kind or the other.  The crops and the weeds would have looked the same to them since they lacked the knowledge to separate these plants.  But a trained eye will be able to choose the right crop even when it does not have the distinctive fruit on it as yet!

All men and women are not the same in character. Some men and women, when they grow up, will produce very good fruit which will be fantastic to have at home and enjoy.  Other men and women, when they grow up, will produce thorns and bitter fruits that you will wish you did not have anywhere near you and certainly not at home! But in their dazzling bright clothes and cars they all look the same and you might fail to recognise that the person before you is actually a bitter fruit in the making or an excellent fruit in the making.  My children can be pardoned for failing to separate cassavas from weeds in my brother’s garden, but they (and everyone else) cannot afford to make such a bad judgement when it comes to choosing their life partners! It will be too costly. So how can we see well enough so that we can choose right?

Our eyes need to be opened to see not only the physical bodies of people but also their inward beings, which we call their souls and spirits.  How can this happen?

  1. Come to the Lord.

When you come to God through Jesus Christ, He will open your eyes. Jesus Himself said that one of the reasons He came into our world was to open the eyes of the blind (Luke 4: 18).  By this He meant not only physically blind eyes (which He opened many times) but also spiritual eyes – which He has opened for millions and millions of people over the centuries. “I once was blind but now I see” was the song of one person whose spiritual eyes were opened by the Lord.

When you pray and ask Him, He will open your eyes.

  1. God’s word also helps us to separate yams from weeds:

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?  What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?  (2 Corinthians 6:14-16)

All men and women are NOT the same in character.  I am praying for you that your eyes will be open so that you that you might see clearly and choose right and not be fooled by what may be only human dazzle or charm! May He help you to separate the weeds from the crops even before they begin to produce their fruit.

awesome adidas shoes for running and casualties of civil war

awesome adidas shoes for running and casualties of civil war