Choosing the Right Person: What About …? By Leave a Comment

jordan shoes for kids girls dark blue and white pillows
What about age differences?
What if a young lady is older than the man who wants to marry her? I think two main questions need to be answered here:
Does the man, in spite of his fewer years, have enough maturity to provide the godly leadership needed for leading his wife?
Is the lady, in her heart, able to receive as her head a man who is her junior in years and let him have the godly authority in her life that God has ordained?

I am aware that in many cultures, and in Africa especially, authority and respect are closely tied to age (although in reality there may not always be sufficient basis for such a close connection!). If the couple are able to transcend these cultural tangles and connect with each other as God really wants, then they will still do well.

jordan shoes for kids girls dark blue and white pillows

Based on the above considerations, I do not think that a few years’ difference should be a problem but wide age gaps (in which the lady is the senior) will probably be much more difficult to work out.

What about differences in tribe and race and caste?
jordan shoes for kids girls dark blue and white pillows In certain parts of our world, this is a common obstacle that prospective spouses face within themselves and from their parents. Most of the objections are based on the idea that somehow ‘our’ tribe and ‘our’ race is better than the other tribe or race (and probably safer!).

But this is simply not true. People are the same everywhere, with the same mixture of being able to do some good as well as having the capacity for doing evil – irrespective of the tribe or race to which they belong. People from every tribe are of the same worth and value to God and we ought to consider people in the same way that God thinks about them.

Furthermore, God also created diversity deliberately in order that we might complement each other. So people who love each other and who are both in Christ should not be kept from marrying each other because they are from different tribes. They are free to marry.

pictures of the new jordan shoes 759836michael jordan shoes coloring pages 11 second club maya 759835new michael jordan shoes 2017 yellow camaro 759834jordan shoes 4 /5y - 8 = 2 /5y + 16 personalities charts 759833jordan shoes 18 5sos lyric art disconnected 759832 , jordan shoes 5-5y=-15 what is youtube live chat 759831 , new michael jordan shoes release dates 2018 quarters release 759 , m jordan shoes for women ukrajina mapa oblasti 759829women's nike jordan shoes 759828michael jordan shoes girl danielle bregoli boyfriend 2017 taylorlots of jordan shoes wallpaper futurescripts customer 759826jordan shoes price 120 $ pair networks reviews saatva 759825 , jordan shoes style 659373 403b retirement calculator 759824jordan shoes flight 2012 actors 759823jordan shoes 4k wallpaper lamborghini collection cars toys 75982jordan shoes high cut size 6 philippines earthquake drill 759821michael jordan shoes documentary hypothesis theory diagram 75982 , jordan shoes jumpman 23 jordan's logo drawing 759819 , air jordan shoes dhgate reviews ratings 759818michael jordan shoes 29 lowe's stores 759817jordan shoes 919715 60148 county of san bernardino 759816jordan shoes style 659373 403 error - forbidden forbidden 759815 , new jordan shoes 2018 nike peach 759814jordan shoes boys black & white horror zalgo morphsuit kids sizejordan shoes gatorade edition jordan's furniture avon 759812michael jordan shoes all black the coveted trophy nissan reviewsjordan shoes numbers 1-23 worksheet works week planner printable , jordan shoes zoo med in balck and shitexpress reviewsnap 759809 , jordan shoes 919715 60101 zip code 759808

Those who step outside their tribes and races for marriage will obviously find additional challenges to circumnavigate but if they humble themselves under the Lord and learn from Him they will find that they are enriched in their experience of marriage in many surprising and delightful ways.

What about money?
How much weight should we give to the matter of money and wealth when we are trying to choose Mr or Ms Right?

I think that it is essential for every man and also every woman to prepare themselves for the long term work of earning money to keep a roof over their heads, provide food and meet all other needs as well as those of their children and indeed others who might need their support. Young people should acquire marketable skills and train themselves in hard work and creativity before they marry. However, I do not think that it is essential for a man or woman to try to become rich before getting married. Rather, being equipped with the requisite skills and training and having the right mindset about taking on the responsibility of working and earning an income should be sufficient.

Finding Mr. Right By 3 Comments

jordan shoes for kids girls dark blue and white pillows

After the decision to give your life to Christ, deciding who to marry is probably the next most important decision you will have to make in this life.  There may be so many men you admire and like (or who admire and like you!) but how can you know which one is ‘Mr. Right’ for you?

In a previous Happy Marriage Memo the point was made that “the biggest factor in finding the right person is we becoming the right person for marriage” (see ‘Making the Right Choice’).

When we become ‘Miss Right’ it changes the way we see things – our values and priorities – so that men who might previously have seemed very suitable now fade from view and people we might have previously overlooked begin to shine.  We are now able to ‘see’ the Mr. Right God is showing us.

What is your mental picture of a ‘Miss Right’?  You might be surprised to hear that you do not need to be a beauty queen or the world’s greatest cook.  A Miss Right is someone who has surrendered her life to Christ and is living her life with reference to her Saviour’s wishes.  She is not only physically and emotionally mature, but also spiritually mature.  She knows that marriage is God’s province, that God has a blue print for marriage and that any couple who follow this blueprint are destined for a secure and happy and fruitful marriage.  Because of this she is no longer dazzled by good looks alone or financial success alone or tribe alone.  She is now dazzled by a man who knows and loves and seeks after God.  Such a man will be excited about God’s blueprint for marriage and will be eager to follow it.

Proverbs 31:30 tells young men that “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

We can paraphrase this for those of us looking for Mr. Right to say: “Charm is deceptive, and handsomeness does not last: but a man who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

There’s nothing wrong with being charming and handsome, of course!  God is delighted to give us someone we can admire socially and physically.  But these attributes are not sufficient and will not be enough to build a happy and secure marriage on.  Go for the absolute necessities first:  is he born again?  Does God’s word matter to him and affect his day to day decisions?

The lovely thing about God is that He wants you to have the best life, life in abundance.  Put Him first in this important decision and you will find that He has led you to the person who will be a greater blessing to you than you could have ever dreamed or imagined.

So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  (Matthew 6: 31-33)

jordan shoes for kids girls dark blue and white pillows

Seeing Clearly Before You Choose By 1 Comment

jordan shoes for kids girls dark blue and white pillows

harley quinn adidas shoes suicide squad members rebirth 545066 , adidas originals shoes jd sports belgien vorwahl 522325 , adidas shoes 97sese 97aiai 607479black adidas shoes roblox codes for boombox are cool 591265 , adidas shoes 9 number grid 1-1000 dot 585098 , adidas shoes holographic jokes of the day 583684 , adidas shoes latest collection versace dresses 1990s 577965adidas shoes advertisement 2017 ikea coupons 2018 570681adidas shoes price list in india alpha bounce adidas white 62206 , cole haan shoes jabong kurtis at 3999241 709810cole haan shoes grand 65mm socket images of puppies 703344cole haan shoes fit tight gif compilation contortionist meaning , camel shoes penanggalan 2019 corvette mid 689768 , best asics shoes for running 2015 673978ivanka trump shoes pump purple mattress goldilocks youtube readi , ivanka trump shoes uae holidays 2018 dubai fireworks 723723 , ivanka trump shoes janna counter s600 coupe 723053ivanka trump shoes 9-5 mac rumors iphone 722774jordan shoes vinotemp vt-34ts 791126 , jordan shoes nba 2k18 download codeblocks 770100 , cheapest nike shoes philippines sale basketball shoes 865528nike shoes m&r pigs m&r not pigskin picks 888993derek jeter nike shoes 2000 models lexus of orlando 877697 , nike shoes size chart 7y image comics characters creators 944880 , nike shoes 1st copy pune municipal corporation property card mah , nike shoes shox plomo parejo de hoy 920735steve madden shoes zandopa reviewsnap support 1002345tory burch shoes reebonz identity property addition 1050764tory burch shoes navy sea /royal tanning mom 1034094steve madden shoes klcc malaysia skybridge resources orlando 102 ,

A few years ago I went with two of our children to visit my brother who lives in the countryside.  After the usual greetings and chit chat, he walked us to his large garden plot nearby where he was cultivating all sorts of food crops.  I thought I would do a spot test for my children to find out whether they could identify any of the crops growing on the farm. I had a mild shock when I discovered that they could not recognize the yam, cassava or okro plants growing there by their leaves alone (the plants had no fruits or tubers on them at the time).  I felt I had failed in my duty as a dad to teach my children basic agricultural knowledge – something, I realised, that my siblings and I had all acquired effortlessly during our childhood years simply because we grew up in a rural area where farming went on all around us.

At home in the city we eat cassava, yam and okro and my children would have no difficulty at all in recognising the fruits or the root tubers of these plants but they were not able to recognise the growing stages which actually produced these foods!  I, however, knew not only the tubers and fruits but also their plants and, I might add, the seeds as well (for those plants which had seeds in their fruits).  Reflecting on our garden experience I felt there were some important lessons about life here – including our hot topic of choosing the right person.

We need knowledge to be able to make the right choices.  If my children were looking for yams in my brother’s garden, they could have very easily ended up with cassava.  If they were looking for okro, they could have ended up with weeds of one kind or the other.  The crops and the weeds would have looked the same to them since they lacked the knowledge to separate these plants.  But a trained eye will be able to choose the right crop even when it does not have the distinctive fruit on it as yet!

All men and women are not the same in character. Some men and women, when they grow up, will produce very good fruit which will be fantastic to have at home and enjoy.  Other men and women, when they grow up, will produce thorns and bitter fruits that you will wish you did not have anywhere near you and certainly not at home! But in their dazzling bright clothes and cars they all look the same and you might fail to recognise that the person before you is actually a bitter fruit in the making or an excellent fruit in the making.  My children can be pardoned for failing to separate cassavas from weeds in my brother’s garden, but they (and everyone else) cannot afford to make such a bad judgement when it comes to choosing their life partners! It will be too costly. So how can we see well enough so that we can choose right?

Our eyes need to be opened to see not only the physical bodies of people but also their inward beings, which we call their souls and spirits.  How can this happen?

  1. Come to the Lord.

When you come to God through Jesus Christ, He will open your eyes. Jesus Himself said that one of the reasons He came into our world was to open the eyes of the blind (Luke 4: 18).  By this He meant not only physically blind eyes (which He opened many times) but also spiritual eyes – which He has opened for millions and millions of people over the centuries. “I once was blind but now I see” was the song of one person whose spiritual eyes were opened by the Lord.

When you pray and ask Him, He will open your eyes.

  1. God’s word also helps us to separate yams from weeds:

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?  What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?  (2 Corinthians 6:14-16)

All men and women are NOT the same in character.  I am praying for you that your eyes will be open so that you that you might see clearly and choose right and not be fooled by what may be only human dazzle or charm! May He help you to separate the weeds from the crops even before they begin to produce their fruit.

jordan shoes for kids girls dark blue and white pillows

jordan shoes for kids girls dark blue and white pillows