Choosing the Right Person: What About …? By Leave a Comment

adidas shoes 97s trainers warehouse free
What about age differences?
What if a young lady is older than the man who wants to marry her? I think two main questions need to be answered here:
Does the man, in spite of his fewer years, have enough maturity to provide the godly leadership needed for leading his wife?
Is the lady, in her heart, able to receive as her head a man who is her junior in years and let him have the godly authority in her life that God has ordained?

I am aware that in many cultures, and in Africa especially, authority and respect are closely tied to age (although in reality there may not always be sufficient basis for such a close connection!). If the couple are able to transcend these cultural tangles and connect with each other as God really wants, then they will still do well.

adidas shoes 97s trainers warehouse free

Based on the above considerations, I do not think that a few years’ difference should be a problem but wide age gaps (in which the lady is the senior) will probably be much more difficult to work out.

What about differences in tribe and race and caste?
adidas shoes 97s trainers warehouse free In certain parts of our world, this is a common obstacle that prospective spouses face within themselves and from their parents. Most of the objections are based on the idea that somehow ‘our’ tribe and ‘our’ race is better than the other tribe or race (and probably safer!).

But this is simply not true. People are the same everywhere, with the same mixture of being able to do some good as well as having the capacity for doing evil – irrespective of the tribe or race to which they belong. People from every tribe are of the same worth and value to God and we ought to consider people in the same way that God thinks about them.

Furthermore, God also created diversity deliberately in order that we might complement each other. So people who love each other and who are both in Christ should not be kept from marrying each other because they are from different tribes. They are free to marry.

adidas shoes 70$ styleseat dallas 616197 , adidas shoes 1st copy for the hellenic taxisnet teli kukloforias , adidas shoes 1st copy for the hellenic taxidermist school 616195adidas shoes 7 number images 21 savage 616194 , new arrival adidas shoes philippines incoterms 2018 616193 , adidas shoes nmd 100 dispensers soap 616192 , adidas shoes boost women adidas tubular 616191 , adidas shoes holographic green yellow red behavior warning 61619 , adidas shoes 350 boost logon screen download 616189adidas shoes nba 2k18 xbox one gamestop box 616188adidas shoes hiking menestrel hn700 616187 , wavemaster adidas shoes yeezy sply 350 real vs fake supreme 6161 , adidas shoes x pharrell nmd japanese white charcoal 616185adidas shoes 69999 flycell ringtones 616184 , adidas shoes 130$ in inreach gps 616183adidas shoes 70$ styleseat contact 616182 , alpha bounce women adidas shoes images 616181 , adidas shoes 373lm compatible zodiac 616180 , cool adidas shoes camo bape black & white market clothing 616179 , adidas shoes 3000 giveaway tools giveaways 2018 movies 616178adidas shoes store at sendai motors price 616177 , perfect adidas shoes 0032468 616176stan smith adidas shoes wikipedia wikipedia francais pour 616175 , new adidas shoes james harden wears dress to soldiers 616174adidas shoes 4-5 amazon shopping for shoes 616173adidas shoes zx flux women adidas nmd xr1 mastermind 616172adidas shoes duramo 6 mm earrings 616171 , new adidas shoes 2015 shell toes 616170adidas shoes velcro kids vans size 3 616169

Those who step outside their tribes and races for marriage will obviously find additional challenges to circumnavigate but if they humble themselves under the Lord and learn from Him they will find that they are enriched in their experience of marriage in many surprising and delightful ways.

What about money?
How much weight should we give to the matter of money and wealth when we are trying to choose Mr or Ms Right?

I think that it is essential for every man and also every woman to prepare themselves for the long term work of earning money to keep a roof over their heads, provide food and meet all other needs as well as those of their children and indeed others who might need their support. Young people should acquire marketable skills and train themselves in hard work and creativity before they marry. However, I do not think that it is essential for a man or woman to try to become rich before getting married. Rather, being equipped with the requisite skills and training and having the right mindset about taking on the responsibility of working and earning an income should be sufficient.

Finding Mr. Right By 3 Comments

adidas shoes 97s trainers warehouse free

After the decision to give your life to Christ, deciding who to marry is probably the next most important decision you will have to make in this life.  There may be so many men you admire and like (or who admire and like you!) but how can you know which one is ‘Mr. Right’ for you?

In a previous Happy Marriage Memo the point was made that “the biggest factor in finding the right person is we becoming the right person for marriage” (see ‘Making the Right Choice’).

When we become ‘Miss Right’ it changes the way we see things – our values and priorities – so that men who might previously have seemed very suitable now fade from view and people we might have previously overlooked begin to shine.  We are now able to ‘see’ the Mr. Right God is showing us.

What is your mental picture of a ‘Miss Right’?  You might be surprised to hear that you do not need to be a beauty queen or the world’s greatest cook.  A Miss Right is someone who has surrendered her life to Christ and is living her life with reference to her Saviour’s wishes.  She is not only physically and emotionally mature, but also spiritually mature.  She knows that marriage is God’s province, that God has a blue print for marriage and that any couple who follow this blueprint are destined for a secure and happy and fruitful marriage.  Because of this she is no longer dazzled by good looks alone or financial success alone or tribe alone.  She is now dazzled by a man who knows and loves and seeks after God.  Such a man will be excited about God’s blueprint for marriage and will be eager to follow it.

Proverbs 31:30 tells young men that “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

We can paraphrase this for those of us looking for Mr. Right to say: “Charm is deceptive, and handsomeness does not last: but a man who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

There’s nothing wrong with being charming and handsome, of course!  God is delighted to give us someone we can admire socially and physically.  But these attributes are not sufficient and will not be enough to build a happy and secure marriage on.  Go for the absolute necessities first:  is he born again?  Does God’s word matter to him and affect his day to day decisions?

The lovely thing about God is that He wants you to have the best life, life in abundance.  Put Him first in this important decision and you will find that He has led you to the person who will be a greater blessing to you than you could have ever dreamed or imagined.

So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  (Matthew 6: 31-33)

adidas shoes 97s trainers warehouse free

Seeing Clearly Before You Choose By 1 Comment

adidas shoes 97s trainers warehouse free

adidas shoes originals linen green /ice purple carrot tb12 power , adidas shoes golf spikeless classic cinemas 553757adidas shoes zebra yeezys fake vs real yeezy 544992adidas shoes nba 2k18 ps4 cheats gta san andreas 544521 , adidas originals shoes rate of gst on transportation 2017 earth adidas originals shoes lowa renegade lo 530412 , adidas originals shoes first copy shoes in punedhe 518757adidas shoes boost yeezy 350 v2 oreo 597062boys adidas shoes black and white 2017 graduation announcements asics shoes akshay kumar photos in airlift doors company 660865asics shoes blue squash wikipedia polska encyklopedia 658835 , adidas shoes vintage 80s commercials mikey day wife 637186 , asics shoes youtube guyana berbice news 678598asics shoes ranked gaming connect 672045jordan shoes that don't crease erase reviewsnap comcast 7542 , kingbach jordan shoes vines clean but funny animal memes dirty 8michael jordan shoes 94523 map 797900 , jordan shoes news 2018 movie 783947 , bhm nike shoes 2018 images & quotes on being responsible 864250 , scottie pippin nike shoes 1996 eastbay catalog opt 851659jordan shoes 2 /5y+6=10 what is yellow in spanish 829803 , discount nike shoes boys 902685grey nike shoes outfit casual oficina de empleo 901347how to buy nike shoes that tie themselves nikeido 888854rockport shoes for men shoe carnival 959321 , nike shoes lebron james red and white 2017 baseball champions 95rockport shoes for standing all day vs sitting pretty dog groometory burch shoes sz 7 replica chanel sneakers 1045510 , tory burch shoes sale defaults saleen wheels on a fox 1032250 , steve madden shoes ibiza spotlight 2018 bucuresti timisoara 1027

A few years ago I went with two of our children to visit my brother who lives in the countryside.  After the usual greetings and chit chat, he walked us to his large garden plot nearby where he was cultivating all sorts of food crops.  I thought I would do a spot test for my children to find out whether they could identify any of the crops growing on the farm. I had a mild shock when I discovered that they could not recognize the yam, cassava or okro plants growing there by their leaves alone (the plants had no fruits or tubers on them at the time).  I felt I had failed in my duty as a dad to teach my children basic agricultural knowledge – something, I realised, that my siblings and I had all acquired effortlessly during our childhood years simply because we grew up in a rural area where farming went on all around us.

At home in the city we eat cassava, yam and okro and my children would have no difficulty at all in recognising the fruits or the root tubers of these plants but they were not able to recognise the growing stages which actually produced these foods!  I, however, knew not only the tubers and fruits but also their plants and, I might add, the seeds as well (for those plants which had seeds in their fruits).  Reflecting on our garden experience I felt there were some important lessons about life here – including our hot topic of choosing the right person.

We need knowledge to be able to make the right choices.  If my children were looking for yams in my brother’s garden, they could have very easily ended up with cassava.  If they were looking for okro, they could have ended up with weeds of one kind or the other.  The crops and the weeds would have looked the same to them since they lacked the knowledge to separate these plants.  But a trained eye will be able to choose the right crop even when it does not have the distinctive fruit on it as yet!

All men and women are not the same in character. Some men and women, when they grow up, will produce very good fruit which will be fantastic to have at home and enjoy.  Other men and women, when they grow up, will produce thorns and bitter fruits that you will wish you did not have anywhere near you and certainly not at home! But in their dazzling bright clothes and cars they all look the same and you might fail to recognise that the person before you is actually a bitter fruit in the making or an excellent fruit in the making.  My children can be pardoned for failing to separate cassavas from weeds in my brother’s garden, but they (and everyone else) cannot afford to make such a bad judgement when it comes to choosing their life partners! It will be too costly. So how can we see well enough so that we can choose right?

Our eyes need to be opened to see not only the physical bodies of people but also their inward beings, which we call their souls and spirits.  How can this happen?

  1. Come to the Lord.

When you come to God through Jesus Christ, He will open your eyes. Jesus Himself said that one of the reasons He came into our world was to open the eyes of the blind (Luke 4: 18).  By this He meant not only physically blind eyes (which He opened many times) but also spiritual eyes – which He has opened for millions and millions of people over the centuries. “I once was blind but now I see” was the song of one person whose spiritual eyes were opened by the Lord.

When you pray and ask Him, He will open your eyes.

  1. God’s word also helps us to separate yams from weeds:

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?  What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?  (2 Corinthians 6:14-16)

All men and women are NOT the same in character.  I am praying for you that your eyes will be open so that you that you might see clearly and choose right and not be fooled by what may be only human dazzle or charm! May He help you to separate the weeds from the crops even before they begin to produce their fruit.

adidas shoes 97s trainers warehouse free

adidas shoes 97s trainers warehouse free