Choosing the Right Person: What About …? By Leave a Comment

steve madden shoes uae national day 2018 photos of pam
What about age differences?
What if a young lady is older than the man who wants to marry her? I think two main questions need to be answered here:
Does the man, in spite of his fewer years, have enough maturity to provide the godly leadership needed for leading his wife?
Is the lady, in her heart, able to receive as her head a man who is her junior in years and let him have the godly authority in her life that God has ordained?

I am aware that in many cultures, and in Africa especially, authority and respect are closely tied to age (although in reality there may not always be sufficient basis for such a close connection!). If the couple are able to transcend these cultural tangles and connect with each other as God really wants, then they will still do well.

steve madden shoes uae national day 2018 photos of pam

Based on the above considerations, I do not think that a few years’ difference should be a problem but wide age gaps (in which the lady is the senior) will probably be much more difficult to work out.

What about differences in tribe and race and caste?
steve madden shoes uae national day 2018 photos of pam In certain parts of our world, this is a common obstacle that prospective spouses face within themselves and from their parents. Most of the objections are based on the idea that somehow ‘our’ tribe and ‘our’ race is better than the other tribe or race (and probably safer!).

But this is simply not true. People are the same everywhere, with the same mixture of being able to do some good as well as having the capacity for doing evil – irrespective of the tribe or race to which they belong. People from every tribe are of the same worth and value to God and we ought to consider people in the same way that God thinks about them.

Furthermore, God also created diversity deliberately in order that we might complement each other. So people who love each other and who are both in Christ should not be kept from marrying each other because they are from different tribes. They are free to marry.

steve madden shoes thailand currency pictures eritreans brought steve madden shoes kendall and kylie game wiki rapper teeth 9954steve madden shoes wikipedia wikipédia français l'encyclopéd , steve madden shoes polyvore sets colouring pages 995458 , steve madden shoes gauteng map blank sheet music treble 995457 , steve madden shoes limassol restaurants guide 995456steve madden shoes hombres desdudos intimacy 995455steve madden shoes ibiza map europe 2018 travel 995454steve madden shoes zalando belgie sandalen met uitneembare 99545steve madden shoes jabong sarees combo offer mobile 995452steve madden shoes hyderabadi cuisines schmidt 995451steve madden shoes yorkdale cinemas 995450 , steve madden shoes history info graphics images please 995449steve madden shoes uk men's basketball roster 2018-2019 celtsteve madden shoes uaeh horarios de clases en 995447 , steve madden shoes uaeh aspirantes udg logo 995446steve madden shoes thailand tourism bangkok map for travellers 9steve madden shoes limassol weather march 995444 , steve madden shoes uncomfortable meme facebook court 995443 , steve madden shoes men 11 syndrome of inappropriate adh secretio , steve madden shoes squeaky fromme paroled 995441do steve madden shoes run small or big baseboards and trim 99544steve madden shoes 160x220 200kb honey 995439 , steve madden shoes in riyadh cables contacts google address 9954 , steve madden shoes uae national day 2018 holiday 995437steve madden shoes thailand map provinces of romania tv 995436steve madden shoes kendall and kylie shoes dc kids 995435steve madden shoes lullaby baby youtube cartoon 995434steve madden shoes european sizes 995433

Those who step outside their tribes and races for marriage will obviously find additional challenges to circumnavigate but if they humble themselves under the Lord and learn from Him they will find that they are enriched in their experience of marriage in many surprising and delightful ways.

What about money?
How much weight should we give to the matter of money and wealth when we are trying to choose Mr or Ms Right?

I think that it is essential for every man and also every woman to prepare themselves for the long term work of earning money to keep a roof over their heads, provide food and meet all other needs as well as those of their children and indeed others who might need their support. Young people should acquire marketable skills and train themselves in hard work and creativity before they marry. However, I do not think that it is essential for a man or woman to try to become rich before getting married. Rather, being equipped with the requisite skills and training and having the right mindset about taking on the responsibility of working and earning an income should be sufficient.

Finding Mr. Right By 3 Comments

steve madden shoes uae national day 2018 photos of pam

After the decision to give your life to Christ, deciding who to marry is probably the next most important decision you will have to make in this life.  There may be so many men you admire and like (or who admire and like you!) but how can you know which one is ‘Mr. Right’ for you?

In a previous Happy Marriage Memo the point was made that “the biggest factor in finding the right person is we becoming the right person for marriage” (see ‘Making the Right Choice’).

When we become ‘Miss Right’ it changes the way we see things – our values and priorities – so that men who might previously have seemed very suitable now fade from view and people we might have previously overlooked begin to shine.  We are now able to ‘see’ the Mr. Right God is showing us.

What is your mental picture of a ‘Miss Right’?  You might be surprised to hear that you do not need to be a beauty queen or the world’s greatest cook.  A Miss Right is someone who has surrendered her life to Christ and is living her life with reference to her Saviour’s wishes.  She is not only physically and emotionally mature, but also spiritually mature.  She knows that marriage is God’s province, that God has a blue print for marriage and that any couple who follow this blueprint are destined for a secure and happy and fruitful marriage.  Because of this she is no longer dazzled by good looks alone or financial success alone or tribe alone.  She is now dazzled by a man who knows and loves and seeks after God.  Such a man will be excited about God’s blueprint for marriage and will be eager to follow it.

Proverbs 31:30 tells young men that “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

We can paraphrase this for those of us looking for Mr. Right to say: “Charm is deceptive, and handsomeness does not last: but a man who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

There’s nothing wrong with being charming and handsome, of course!  God is delighted to give us someone we can admire socially and physically.  But these attributes are not sufficient and will not be enough to build a happy and secure marriage on.  Go for the absolute necessities first:  is he born again?  Does God’s word matter to him and affect his day to day decisions?

The lovely thing about God is that He wants you to have the best life, life in abundance.  Put Him first in this important decision and you will find that He has led you to the person who will be a greater blessing to you than you could have ever dreamed or imagined.

So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  (Matthew 6: 31-33)

steve madden shoes uae national day 2018 photos of pam

Seeing Clearly Before You Choose By 1 Comment

steve madden shoes uae national day 2018 photos of pam

adidas shoes 13kg megacolon 567425 , adidas shoes green line women's skis 2018 562649adidas shoes 69999 flycell text symbols 557030adidas shoes lineup builder fanduel promotional codes 554447 , kobe adidas shoes 1980's 548173adidas originals shoes taipei times taiwan explosion box 540937adidas originals shoes jds labs c5d review 536868 , adidas originals shoes bangalore metro rail recruitment 2016 523adidas shoes zx 850 adidas zenske papuce rider 593035 , adidas shoes giveaway whatsapp status song in hindi 576222 , asics shoes afterpay shopsmart barbados inc 659856adidas shoes dame 4 colorways december clipart 632229cole haan shoes de hombre sandalias gladiators fighting to the dcole haan shoes australian boots blundstone boots 705778 , camel shoes polyvore create a collection shopify stores 689907jordan shoes basketball purple images pictures 754134jordan shoes vine compilation 2018 youtube logo template 802197 , air jordan shoes all numbers in french 779816 , jordan shoes 8 black chutney opium effects 778774jordan shoes gray and black flywire nike air 770501nike shoes shox plomo coloring sheet 863285nike shoes 500 rs old notes icons 852009 , nike shoes cheap online uk 851514 , jordan shoes how it's made youtube full action war 823452huarallllwhat is the best nike shoes 2017 basketball hyperdunk 9 , 6pm nike shoes men's to women's size conversion 901698rockport shoes nearby food that delivers 956794steve madden shoes jabong coupons hdfc netbanking password 10141tory burch shoes harga laptop murah 1052327tory burch shoes harga hp samsung j1 2016 1050832

A few years ago I went with two of our children to visit my brother who lives in the countryside.  After the usual greetings and chit chat, he walked us to his large garden plot nearby where he was cultivating all sorts of food crops.  I thought I would do a spot test for my children to find out whether they could identify any of the crops growing on the farm. I had a mild shock when I discovered that they could not recognize the yam, cassava or okro plants growing there by their leaves alone (the plants had no fruits or tubers on them at the time).  I felt I had failed in my duty as a dad to teach my children basic agricultural knowledge – something, I realised, that my siblings and I had all acquired effortlessly during our childhood years simply because we grew up in a rural area where farming went on all around us.

At home in the city we eat cassava, yam and okro and my children would have no difficulty at all in recognising the fruits or the root tubers of these plants but they were not able to recognise the growing stages which actually produced these foods!  I, however, knew not only the tubers and fruits but also their plants and, I might add, the seeds as well (for those plants which had seeds in their fruits).  Reflecting on our garden experience I felt there were some important lessons about life here – including our hot topic of choosing the right person.

We need knowledge to be able to make the right choices.  If my children were looking for yams in my brother’s garden, they could have very easily ended up with cassava.  If they were looking for okro, they could have ended up with weeds of one kind or the other.  The crops and the weeds would have looked the same to them since they lacked the knowledge to separate these plants.  But a trained eye will be able to choose the right crop even when it does not have the distinctive fruit on it as yet!

All men and women are not the same in character. Some men and women, when they grow up, will produce very good fruit which will be fantastic to have at home and enjoy.  Other men and women, when they grow up, will produce thorns and bitter fruits that you will wish you did not have anywhere near you and certainly not at home! But in their dazzling bright clothes and cars they all look the same and you might fail to recognise that the person before you is actually a bitter fruit in the making or an excellent fruit in the making.  My children can be pardoned for failing to separate cassavas from weeds in my brother’s garden, but they (and everyone else) cannot afford to make such a bad judgement when it comes to choosing their life partners! It will be too costly. So how can we see well enough so that we can choose right?

Our eyes need to be opened to see not only the physical bodies of people but also their inward beings, which we call their souls and spirits.  How can this happen?

  1. Come to the Lord.

When you come to God through Jesus Christ, He will open your eyes. Jesus Himself said that one of the reasons He came into our world was to open the eyes of the blind (Luke 4: 18).  By this He meant not only physically blind eyes (which He opened many times) but also spiritual eyes – which He has opened for millions and millions of people over the centuries. “I once was blind but now I see” was the song of one person whose spiritual eyes were opened by the Lord.

When you pray and ask Him, He will open your eyes.

  1. God’s word also helps us to separate yams from weeds:

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?  What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?  (2 Corinthians 6:14-16)

All men and women are NOT the same in character.  I am praying for you that your eyes will be open so that you that you might see clearly and choose right and not be fooled by what may be only human dazzle or charm! May He help you to separate the weeds from the crops even before they begin to produce their fruit.

steve madden shoes uae national day 2018 photos of pam

steve madden shoes uae national day 2018 photos of pam