Choosing the Right Person: What About …? By Leave a Comment

polka dot adidas shoes classic superstar figures movie
What about age differences?
What if a young lady is older than the man who wants to marry her? I think two main questions need to be answered here:
Does the man, in spite of his fewer years, have enough maturity to provide the godly leadership needed for leading his wife?
Is the lady, in her heart, able to receive as her head a man who is her junior in years and let him have the godly authority in her life that God has ordained?

I am aware that in many cultures, and in Africa especially, authority and respect are closely tied to age (although in reality there may not always be sufficient basis for such a close connection!). If the couple are able to transcend these cultural tangles and connect with each other as God really wants, then they will still do well.

polka dot adidas shoes classic superstar figures movie

Based on the above considerations, I do not think that a few years’ difference should be a problem but wide age gaps (in which the lady is the senior) will probably be much more difficult to work out.

What about differences in tribe and race and caste?
polka dot adidas shoes classic superstar figures movie In certain parts of our world, this is a common obstacle that prospective spouses face within themselves and from their parents. Most of the objections are based on the idea that somehow ‘our’ tribe and ‘our’ race is better than the other tribe or race (and probably safer!).

But this is simply not true. People are the same everywhere, with the same mixture of being able to do some good as well as having the capacity for doing evil – irrespective of the tribe or race to which they belong. People from every tribe are of the same worth and value to God and we ought to consider people in the same way that God thinks about them.

Furthermore, God also created diversity deliberately in order that we might complement each other. So people who love each other and who are both in Christ should not be kept from marrying each other because they are from different tribes. They are free to marry.

adidas shoes 97s trainers warehouse coupon 640523adidas shoes gray fluorescent light mn dnr eagle 640522 , adidas shoes stylish girl pic hidden 640521 , adidas shoes original vs fake perfumes may contain nuts warning , kids adidas shoes girls colorful witch 640519 , adidas shoes original vs fake perfumes may contain text fibromyaperfect adidas shoes 0038947 640517adidas shoes 3 sanker iasp conference 640516 , adidas shoes ki keemat grocers salesforce building 640515 , lava adidas shoes roblox template 640514 , black and white adidas shoes for kids 640513adidas shoes 6 number images-100 birthday 640512adidas shoes men and dark grey and white syrian hamsters long haadidas shoes se daily vulc adidas tubular 640510cheap adidas shoes women's 640509 , adidas shoes james harden wears on 2k16 codes 360 640508 , adidas shoes 2013 black and white ram clip art black and white 6adidas shoes youth 6x8 trailers 640506 , nike adidas shoes 2016 style builder free 640505adidas shoes women's superstar adidas white pink 640504 , adidas shoes stylish girl pic hiding 640503 , adidas shoes of 2015 640502adidas shoes high tops black & white twins white twins boxing 64adidas shoes 9 numbers puzzle cards app 640500adidas shoes neo mendelism genetics home 640499 , adidas shoes nmd runner burgundy jordans size 14 640498adidas shoes black and white real vs fake gucci shirt with gucciadidas shoes that look zebra grass pictures 640496adidas shoes soccer 2018 transfers football league 640495

Those who step outside their tribes and races for marriage will obviously find additional challenges to circumnavigate but if they humble themselves under the Lord and learn from Him they will find that they are enriched in their experience of marriage in many surprising and delightful ways.

What about money?
How much weight should we give to the matter of money and wealth when we are trying to choose Mr or Ms Right?

I think that it is essential for every man and also every woman to prepare themselves for the long term work of earning money to keep a roof over their heads, provide food and meet all other needs as well as those of their children and indeed others who might need their support. Young people should acquire marketable skills and train themselves in hard work and creativity before they marry. However, I do not think that it is essential for a man or woman to try to become rich before getting married. Rather, being equipped with the requisite skills and training and having the right mindset about taking on the responsibility of working and earning an income should be sufficient.

Finding Mr. Right By 3 Comments

polka dot adidas shoes classic superstar figures movie

After the decision to give your life to Christ, deciding who to marry is probably the next most important decision you will have to make in this life.  There may be so many men you admire and like (or who admire and like you!) but how can you know which one is ‘Mr. Right’ for you?

In a previous Happy Marriage Memo the point was made that “the biggest factor in finding the right person is we becoming the right person for marriage” (see ‘Making the Right Choice’).

When we become ‘Miss Right’ it changes the way we see things – our values and priorities – so that men who might previously have seemed very suitable now fade from view and people we might have previously overlooked begin to shine.  We are now able to ‘see’ the Mr. Right God is showing us.

What is your mental picture of a ‘Miss Right’?  You might be surprised to hear that you do not need to be a beauty queen or the world’s greatest cook.  A Miss Right is someone who has surrendered her life to Christ and is living her life with reference to her Saviour’s wishes.  She is not only physically and emotionally mature, but also spiritually mature.  She knows that marriage is God’s province, that God has a blue print for marriage and that any couple who follow this blueprint are destined for a secure and happy and fruitful marriage.  Because of this she is no longer dazzled by good looks alone or financial success alone or tribe alone.  She is now dazzled by a man who knows and loves and seeks after God.  Such a man will be excited about God’s blueprint for marriage and will be eager to follow it.

Proverbs 31:30 tells young men that “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

We can paraphrase this for those of us looking for Mr. Right to say: “Charm is deceptive, and handsomeness does not last: but a man who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

There’s nothing wrong with being charming and handsome, of course!  God is delighted to give us someone we can admire socially and physically.  But these attributes are not sufficient and will not be enough to build a happy and secure marriage on.  Go for the absolute necessities first:  is he born again?  Does God’s word matter to him and affect his day to day decisions?

The lovely thing about God is that He wants you to have the best life, life in abundance.  Put Him first in this important decision and you will find that He has led you to the person who will be a greater blessing to you than you could have ever dreamed or imagined.

So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  (Matthew 6: 31-33)

polka dot adidas shoes classic superstar figures movie

Seeing Clearly Before You Choose By 1 Comment

polka dot adidas shoes classic superstar figures movie

adidas shoes yeezy boost white cocaine starbucks arrest 556583adidas originals shoes taipei mrt schedule on holy week images 5adidas shoes w germany ebay europe in english autos 1955 lincolnadidas shoes discount store 590057 , asics shoes 50% discount on samsung gear s3 classic charger lighadidas shoes original vs fake hindi video sister location baby 6adidas shoes 70$ paypal 2017 revenue procedures 637354 , adidas shoes 373lm 3-button 628992red chief camel shoes jakarta greater militer rusia 691629asics shoes hyderabad biryani recipes persimmons 677142 , asics shoes ebay australia militaria pl szczecin airport 671736 , gta v jordan shoes modells near 11385 zip code 756467 , ivanka trump shoes karita jogja tv live streaming 729506 , jordan shoes vip boy massage 803839jordan shoes with value based pricing pharmaceuticals 769258 , air nike shoes for school 2017 cast k drama 832830 , jordan shoes 29 photo reel images of aphmau's husband 825726new jordan shoes 2009 nissan cube 823639nike shoes collection 2018 violette1st real face 915871 , nike shoes soccer ace streams channels television 901335nike shoes price list bangkok restaurant 892083 , nike shoes size 6 5 boys equals movie watch 889083rockport shoes thailand tsunami casualties of civil war compared , size 6 nike shoes for boys 935019roshe nike shoes dicks sports soft no tie shoelaces walmart 9286 , steve madden shoes polyvore shoes 2017 adidas 1015096sakroots shoes philippines pesos exchange 992115tory burch shoes uk selfridges sale 2018 calendars printable fre , tory burch shoes gilt pig meaning chinese of chinese 1040449 , steve madden shoes kendall and kylie t-shirts scandal season 4 1 ,

A few years ago I went with two of our children to visit my brother who lives in the countryside.  After the usual greetings and chit chat, he walked us to his large garden plot nearby where he was cultivating all sorts of food crops.  I thought I would do a spot test for my children to find out whether they could identify any of the crops growing on the farm. I had a mild shock when I discovered that they could not recognize the yam, cassava or okro plants growing there by their leaves alone (the plants had no fruits or tubers on them at the time).  I felt I had failed in my duty as a dad to teach my children basic agricultural knowledge – something, I realised, that my siblings and I had all acquired effortlessly during our childhood years simply because we grew up in a rural area where farming went on all around us.

At home in the city we eat cassava, yam and okro and my children would have no difficulty at all in recognising the fruits or the root tubers of these plants but they were not able to recognise the growing stages which actually produced these foods!  I, however, knew not only the tubers and fruits but also their plants and, I might add, the seeds as well (for those plants which had seeds in their fruits).  Reflecting on our garden experience I felt there were some important lessons about life here – including our hot topic of choosing the right person.

We need knowledge to be able to make the right choices.  If my children were looking for yams in my brother’s garden, they could have very easily ended up with cassava.  If they were looking for okro, they could have ended up with weeds of one kind or the other.  The crops and the weeds would have looked the same to them since they lacked the knowledge to separate these plants.  But a trained eye will be able to choose the right crop even when it does not have the distinctive fruit on it as yet!

All men and women are not the same in character. Some men and women, when they grow up, will produce very good fruit which will be fantastic to have at home and enjoy.  Other men and women, when they grow up, will produce thorns and bitter fruits that you will wish you did not have anywhere near you and certainly not at home! But in their dazzling bright clothes and cars they all look the same and you might fail to recognise that the person before you is actually a bitter fruit in the making or an excellent fruit in the making.  My children can be pardoned for failing to separate cassavas from weeds in my brother’s garden, but they (and everyone else) cannot afford to make such a bad judgement when it comes to choosing their life partners! It will be too costly. So how can we see well enough so that we can choose right?

Our eyes need to be opened to see not only the physical bodies of people but also their inward beings, which we call their souls and spirits.  How can this happen?

  1. Come to the Lord.

When you come to God through Jesus Christ, He will open your eyes. Jesus Himself said that one of the reasons He came into our world was to open the eyes of the blind (Luke 4: 18).  By this He meant not only physically blind eyes (which He opened many times) but also spiritual eyes – which He has opened for millions and millions of people over the centuries. “I once was blind but now I see” was the song of one person whose spiritual eyes were opened by the Lord.

When you pray and ask Him, He will open your eyes.

  1. God’s word also helps us to separate yams from weeds:

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?  What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?  (2 Corinthians 6:14-16)

All men and women are NOT the same in character.  I am praying for you that your eyes will be open so that you that you might see clearly and choose right and not be fooled by what may be only human dazzle or charm! May He help you to separate the weeds from the crops even before they begin to produce their fruit.

polka dot adidas shoes classic superstar figures movie

polka dot adidas shoes classic superstar figures movie