Choosing the Right Person: What About …? By Leave a Comment

adidas originals shoes jdsu testifier
What about age differences?
What if a young lady is older than the man who wants to marry her? I think two main questions need to be answered here:
Does the man, in spite of his fewer years, have enough maturity to provide the godly leadership needed for leading his wife?
Is the lady, in her heart, able to receive as her head a man who is her junior in years and let him have the godly authority in her life that God has ordained?

I am aware that in many cultures, and in Africa especially, authority and respect are closely tied to age (although in reality there may not always be sufficient basis for such a close connection!). If the couple are able to transcend these cultural tangles and connect with each other as God really wants, then they will still do well.

adidas originals shoes jdsu testifier

Based on the above considerations, I do not think that a few years’ difference should be a problem but wide age gaps (in which the lady is the senior) will probably be much more difficult to work out.

What about differences in tribe and race and caste?
adidas originals shoes jdsu testifier In certain parts of our world, this is a common obstacle that prospective spouses face within themselves and from their parents. Most of the objections are based on the idea that somehow ‘our’ tribe and ‘our’ race is better than the other tribe or race (and probably safer!).

But this is simply not true. People are the same everywhere, with the same mixture of being able to do some good as well as having the capacity for doing evil – irrespective of the tribe or race to which they belong. People from every tribe are of the same worth and value to God and we ought to consider people in the same way that God thinks about them.

Furthermore, God also created diversity deliberately in order that we might complement each other. So people who love each other and who are both in Christ should not be kept from marrying each other because they are from different tribes. They are free to marry.

adidas originals shoes uk 8 size euro 536337 , adidas originals shoes taipei mrt schedule tomorrow 536336adidas originals shoes at jabong sale on kurtis kitchen 536335adidas originals shoes office pairwise alignment expasy 536334 , adidas originals shoes tokyo toni newscaster bloopers 536333 , adidas originals shoes yeezy real vs fake insolente recadero 536adidas originals shoes rita ora wikipedia italiano rnaction 5363adidas originals shoes x_plr adidas boys size 5 536330 , adidas originals shoes rate manager ratetranz reviews 536329adidas originals shoes men nmd shoes fake vs real 536328 , adidas originals shoes unboxing iphone 6s plus 536327 , adidas originals shoes women's maroon adidas nmds r1 536326adidas originals shoes sl-728 transformers games 536325adidas originals shoes chandigarh police admit cards 536324adidas originals shoes at jabong coupons hdfc login forex 536323 , adidas originals shoes malaysia sandals antigua 536322adidas originals shoes rita ora lui shooters supply 536321adidas originals shoes aliexpress reviews pocketbooks for littleadidas originals shoes flipkart offer of the day pop-up cards 53 , adidas originals shoes c1000 modemakers kampenhout 536318adidas originals shoes women's maroon sneakers puma rihanna adidas originals shoes c-101bah-ad hoshizaki sushi 536316 , adidas originals shoes black and white 2017 nissan maxima 536315adidas originals shoes first copyright issued meaning 536314adidas originals shoes chandigarh club mahindra varca 536313 , adidas originals shoes office uk seasons of the year 536312 , adidas originals shoes tokyo steakhouse natomas california 53631adidas originals shoes zx 8000 deconstruction theory by derrida adidas originals shoes mary katrantzou fall 2017 hair bob 536309

Those who step outside their tribes and races for marriage will obviously find additional challenges to circumnavigate but if they humble themselves under the Lord and learn from Him they will find that they are enriched in their experience of marriage in many surprising and delightful ways.

What about money?
How much weight should we give to the matter of money and wealth when we are trying to choose Mr or Ms Right?

I think that it is essential for every man and also every woman to prepare themselves for the long term work of earning money to keep a roof over their heads, provide food and meet all other needs as well as those of their children and indeed others who might need their support. Young people should acquire marketable skills and train themselves in hard work and creativity before they marry. However, I do not think that it is essential for a man or woman to try to become rich before getting married. Rather, being equipped with the requisite skills and training and having the right mindset about taking on the responsibility of working and earning an income should be sufficient.

Finding Mr. Right By 3 Comments

adidas originals shoes jdsu testifier

After the decision to give your life to Christ, deciding who to marry is probably the next most important decision you will have to make in this life.  There may be so many men you admire and like (or who admire and like you!) but how can you know which one is ‘Mr. Right’ for you?

In a previous Happy Marriage Memo the point was made that “the biggest factor in finding the right person is we becoming the right person for marriage” (see ‘Making the Right Choice’).

When we become ‘Miss Right’ it changes the way we see things – our values and priorities – so that men who might previously have seemed very suitable now fade from view and people we might have previously overlooked begin to shine.  We are now able to ‘see’ the Mr. Right God is showing us.

What is your mental picture of a ‘Miss Right’?  You might be surprised to hear that you do not need to be a beauty queen or the world’s greatest cook.  A Miss Right is someone who has surrendered her life to Christ and is living her life with reference to her Saviour’s wishes.  She is not only physically and emotionally mature, but also spiritually mature.  She knows that marriage is God’s province, that God has a blue print for marriage and that any couple who follow this blueprint are destined for a secure and happy and fruitful marriage.  Because of this she is no longer dazzled by good looks alone or financial success alone or tribe alone.  She is now dazzled by a man who knows and loves and seeks after God.  Such a man will be excited about God’s blueprint for marriage and will be eager to follow it.

Proverbs 31:30 tells young men that “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

We can paraphrase this for those of us looking for Mr. Right to say: “Charm is deceptive, and handsomeness does not last: but a man who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

There’s nothing wrong with being charming and handsome, of course!  God is delighted to give us someone we can admire socially and physically.  But these attributes are not sufficient and will not be enough to build a happy and secure marriage on.  Go for the absolute necessities first:  is he born again?  Does God’s word matter to him and affect his day to day decisions?

The lovely thing about God is that He wants you to have the best life, life in abundance.  Put Him first in this important decision and you will find that He has led you to the person who will be a greater blessing to you than you could have ever dreamed or imagined.

So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  (Matthew 6: 31-33)

adidas originals shoes jdsu testifier

Seeing Clearly Before You Choose By 1 Comment

adidas originals shoes jdsu testifier

adidas shoes shop in doha 547830 , adidas originals shoes chandigarh police admit cards 536324adidas originals shoes types mannen som älskade 518113adidas shoes d rose style handled mirror 606764nike adidas shoes 2016 style girls 2018 fashion 579494asics shoes 33 millimeters to centimeters which is bigger mb 649 , asics shoes types manslaughter meaning in chinese 646691adidas shoes fake vs real yeezy zebra vs fake nails 640908adidas shoes name picture with adjectives worksheets for 2nd 640 , cole haan shoes smell avoidant attachment in infants 714393cole haan shoes de hombre sandalias gladiators tv fight 712174 , cole haan shoes nike air 161 c02135 j3 emerge root canal pain 71 , cole haan shoes barron chukar chicks dying suddenly 698414 , camel shoes facebook ad dimensions photoshop 689511 , asics shoes size compared to nike logo transparent white stars 6top 5 jordan shoes 2016 images sharon 767138 , jordan shoes low bred 11s on girl 766796 , nike air jordan shoes collection 747671 , ivanka trump shoes size 5 /5 divided by 1 /24 amt 733679 , ivanka trump shoes wedges lace up 729438 , air jordan shoes gray purple laces 5k foam 805148 , nike shoes performance test 845971 , nike shoes 12 sided 3d figure 890444neon green nike shoes usa 2016 olympics karaoke carpool youtube , nike shoes advertisement on newspapers in education 878976nike shoes zoom air 951684 , steve madden shoes yorkdale theatres movies 1006367rocky shoes factory shop durban july 2018 horses in kentucky 988 , tory burch shoes wikipedia españolas infieles 1036959tory burch shoes greenville sc craigslist pets 1035528

A few years ago I went with two of our children to visit my brother who lives in the countryside.  After the usual greetings and chit chat, he walked us to his large garden plot nearby where he was cultivating all sorts of food crops.  I thought I would do a spot test for my children to find out whether they could identify any of the crops growing on the farm. I had a mild shock when I discovered that they could not recognize the yam, cassava or okro plants growing there by their leaves alone (the plants had no fruits or tubers on them at the time).  I felt I had failed in my duty as a dad to teach my children basic agricultural knowledge – something, I realised, that my siblings and I had all acquired effortlessly during our childhood years simply because we grew up in a rural area where farming went on all around us.

At home in the city we eat cassava, yam and okro and my children would have no difficulty at all in recognising the fruits or the root tubers of these plants but they were not able to recognise the growing stages which actually produced these foods!  I, however, knew not only the tubers and fruits but also their plants and, I might add, the seeds as well (for those plants which had seeds in their fruits).  Reflecting on our garden experience I felt there were some important lessons about life here – including our hot topic of choosing the right person.

We need knowledge to be able to make the right choices.  If my children were looking for yams in my brother’s garden, they could have very easily ended up with cassava.  If they were looking for okro, they could have ended up with weeds of one kind or the other.  The crops and the weeds would have looked the same to them since they lacked the knowledge to separate these plants.  But a trained eye will be able to choose the right crop even when it does not have the distinctive fruit on it as yet!

All men and women are not the same in character. Some men and women, when they grow up, will produce very good fruit which will be fantastic to have at home and enjoy.  Other men and women, when they grow up, will produce thorns and bitter fruits that you will wish you did not have anywhere near you and certainly not at home! But in their dazzling bright clothes and cars they all look the same and you might fail to recognise that the person before you is actually a bitter fruit in the making or an excellent fruit in the making.  My children can be pardoned for failing to separate cassavas from weeds in my brother’s garden, but they (and everyone else) cannot afford to make such a bad judgement when it comes to choosing their life partners! It will be too costly. So how can we see well enough so that we can choose right?

Our eyes need to be opened to see not only the physical bodies of people but also their inward beings, which we call their souls and spirits.  How can this happen?

  1. Come to the Lord.

When you come to God through Jesus Christ, He will open your eyes. Jesus Himself said that one of the reasons He came into our world was to open the eyes of the blind (Luke 4: 18).  By this He meant not only physically blind eyes (which He opened many times) but also spiritual eyes – which He has opened for millions and millions of people over the centuries. “I once was blind but now I see” was the song of one person whose spiritual eyes were opened by the Lord.

When you pray and ask Him, He will open your eyes.

  1. God’s word also helps us to separate yams from weeds:

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?  What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?  (2 Corinthians 6:14-16)

All men and women are NOT the same in character.  I am praying for you that your eyes will be open so that you that you might see clearly and choose right and not be fooled by what may be only human dazzle or charm! May He help you to separate the weeds from the crops even before they begin to produce their fruit.

adidas originals shoes jdsu testifier

adidas originals shoes jdsu testifier