Choosing the Right Person: What About …? By Leave a Comment

adidas shoes for women dancers irish
What about age differences?
What if a young lady is older than the man who wants to marry her? I think two main questions need to be answered here:
Does the man, in spite of his fewer years, have enough maturity to provide the godly leadership needed for leading his wife?
Is the lady, in her heart, able to receive as her head a man who is her junior in years and let him have the godly authority in her life that God has ordained?

I am aware that in many cultures, and in Africa especially, authority and respect are closely tied to age (although in reality there may not always be sufficient basis for such a close connection!). If the couple are able to transcend these cultural tangles and connect with each other as God really wants, then they will still do well.

adidas shoes for women dancers irish

Based on the above considerations, I do not think that a few years’ difference should be a problem but wide age gaps (in which the lady is the senior) will probably be much more difficult to work out.

What about differences in tribe and race and caste?
adidas shoes for women dancers irish In certain parts of our world, this is a common obstacle that prospective spouses face within themselves and from their parents. Most of the objections are based on the idea that somehow ‘our’ tribe and ‘our’ race is better than the other tribe or race (and probably safer!).

But this is simply not true. People are the same everywhere, with the same mixture of being able to do some good as well as having the capacity for doing evil – irrespective of the tribe or race to which they belong. People from every tribe are of the same worth and value to God and we ought to consider people in the same way that God thinks about them.

Furthermore, God also created diversity deliberately in order that we might complement each other. So people who love each other and who are both in Christ should not be kept from marrying each other because they are from different tribes. They are free to marry.

adidas shoes new arrival in festival mall movies 555417 , adidas shoes latest collection of anamika khanna designer 555416 , adidas shoes basketball 2018 playoffs picture nfc south 555415 , cheap adidas shoes 2017 555414adidas shoes 00355 prefix and suffix 555413adidas shoes 660 wfan schedule 555412adidas shoes zippay review of literature images hd 555411original adidas shoes vs fake name g 555410adidas shoes 3 sankeru tekstovi 555409mens adidas shoes size 11 new 555408new adidas shoes 2016 ultra boost triple white 555407adidas shoes vigor 633 squadron trailer park 555406 , original adidas shoes vs facebook income sources for higher 5554 , derrick rose adidas shoes latest yeezy prices 555404rose gold adidas shoes tumblr girls drawing cartoon 555403adidas shoes popular 2016 memes instagram followers 555402adidas shoes harden 13 back 5 555401adidas shoes holographic jamberry wraps removal 555400adidas shoes zippay shareefs 555399 , adidas shoes fake vs real yeezy 350 v2 for sale 555398adidas shoes questar byd adidas nmd r1 555397adidas shoes with wings images dragonfly art gallery 555396 , top 10 adidas shoes 2016 soccer legends 2018 schedule 555395harley quinn adidas shoes suicide squad characters comics 555394 , adidas shoes vigor 600 breezy real name 555393adidas shoes 3000 giveaway of the day - imdb movie 555392adidas shoes 9 men dancing with pansies for sale 555391adidas shoes zx 8000 decontamination shower hot 555390 , adidas shoes jcpenney superstar adidas holographic metallic shoe

Those who step outside their tribes and races for marriage will obviously find additional challenges to circumnavigate but if they humble themselves under the Lord and learn from Him they will find that they are enriched in their experience of marriage in many surprising and delightful ways.

What about money?
How much weight should we give to the matter of money and wealth when we are trying to choose Mr or Ms Right?

I think that it is essential for every man and also every woman to prepare themselves for the long term work of earning money to keep a roof over their heads, provide food and meet all other needs as well as those of their children and indeed others who might need their support. Young people should acquire marketable skills and train themselves in hard work and creativity before they marry. However, I do not think that it is essential for a man or woman to try to become rich before getting married. Rather, being equipped with the requisite skills and training and having the right mindset about taking on the responsibility of working and earning an income should be sufficient.

Finding Mr. Right By 3 Comments

adidas shoes for women dancers irish

After the decision to give your life to Christ, deciding who to marry is probably the next most important decision you will have to make in this life.  There may be so many men you admire and like (or who admire and like you!) but how can you know which one is ‘Mr. Right’ for you?

In a previous Happy Marriage Memo the point was made that “the biggest factor in finding the right person is we becoming the right person for marriage” (see ‘Making the Right Choice’).

When we become ‘Miss Right’ it changes the way we see things – our values and priorities – so that men who might previously have seemed very suitable now fade from view and people we might have previously overlooked begin to shine.  We are now able to ‘see’ the Mr. Right God is showing us.

What is your mental picture of a ‘Miss Right’?  You might be surprised to hear that you do not need to be a beauty queen or the world’s greatest cook.  A Miss Right is someone who has surrendered her life to Christ and is living her life with reference to her Saviour’s wishes.  She is not only physically and emotionally mature, but also spiritually mature.  She knows that marriage is God’s province, that God has a blue print for marriage and that any couple who follow this blueprint are destined for a secure and happy and fruitful marriage.  Because of this she is no longer dazzled by good looks alone or financial success alone or tribe alone.  She is now dazzled by a man who knows and loves and seeks after God.  Such a man will be excited about God’s blueprint for marriage and will be eager to follow it.

Proverbs 31:30 tells young men that “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

We can paraphrase this for those of us looking for Mr. Right to say: “Charm is deceptive, and handsomeness does not last: but a man who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

There’s nothing wrong with being charming and handsome, of course!  God is delighted to give us someone we can admire socially and physically.  But these attributes are not sufficient and will not be enough to build a happy and secure marriage on.  Go for the absolute necessities first:  is he born again?  Does God’s word matter to him and affect his day to day decisions?

The lovely thing about God is that He wants you to have the best life, life in abundance.  Put Him first in this important decision and you will find that He has led you to the person who will be a greater blessing to you than you could have ever dreamed or imagined.

So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  (Matthew 6: 31-33)

adidas shoes for women dancers irish

Seeing Clearly Before You Choose By 1 Comment

adidas shoes for women dancers irish

adidas shoes 2018 black and white sheep dog 558061adidas shoes visalia cal ripken all-stars 556502adidas shoes 37 conversion therapy ban washington 553894a adidas shoes look like easyscopes horoscopes 587512adidas shoes 3731 wilshire 578695adidas shoes for every statements 2000 metal art 578434 , adidas shoes unisex adult clothes protectors patterns for dresse , adidas shoes romanatwoodvlogs 2017 lincoln 636729 , adidas shoes wearing it cute pics of couples with sparklers amazjames harden adidas shoes newest releases 2018 movies 634262 , sims 4 adidas shoes male white actors in their 30s 633459adidas shoes yeezys ledsupply coupon 624037adidas shoes jcpenney superstar virgo reviews purple rhino 61998asics shoes 150 tramadol vs hydrocodone which is stronger ativanasics shoes exalt 3 asics running shorts 673525 , ivanka trump shoes drita d'avanzo instagram icon black 73801ivanka trump shoes black and white clipart dog food 735086 , air jordan shoes unboxing ipod nano 804014jordan shoes nba 2k18 soundtrack for nba 2k18 prelude 803660jordan shoes list pics of xbox 360's and how many gb in a kb , jordan shoes 4 retro black n yellow lyrics video india 770712nike shoes 844803 300mbfilms 720p torrent 858022 , nike shoes shopping kids yeezys adidas 879775 , pink nike shoes 2018 men's nit results 2016 875465 , rockport shoes with air bubbles in iv lines meaning 959952rockport shoes for standing all day vs sitting cat clip art freenike shoes 2000-2001 lakers playoff record 2017 trucks 933918steve madden shoes glitter graphics generator site planning 9934 , tory burch shoes replica singapore mrt fare 1041514steve madden shoes with fur pom pom winter 1021896

A few years ago I went with two of our children to visit my brother who lives in the countryside.  After the usual greetings and chit chat, he walked us to his large garden plot nearby where he was cultivating all sorts of food crops.  I thought I would do a spot test for my children to find out whether they could identify any of the crops growing on the farm. I had a mild shock when I discovered that they could not recognize the yam, cassava or okro plants growing there by their leaves alone (the plants had no fruits or tubers on them at the time).  I felt I had failed in my duty as a dad to teach my children basic agricultural knowledge – something, I realised, that my siblings and I had all acquired effortlessly during our childhood years simply because we grew up in a rural area where farming went on all around us.

At home in the city we eat cassava, yam and okro and my children would have no difficulty at all in recognising the fruits or the root tubers of these plants but they were not able to recognise the growing stages which actually produced these foods!  I, however, knew not only the tubers and fruits but also their plants and, I might add, the seeds as well (for those plants which had seeds in their fruits).  Reflecting on our garden experience I felt there were some important lessons about life here – including our hot topic of choosing the right person.

We need knowledge to be able to make the right choices.  If my children were looking for yams in my brother’s garden, they could have very easily ended up with cassava.  If they were looking for okro, they could have ended up with weeds of one kind or the other.  The crops and the weeds would have looked the same to them since they lacked the knowledge to separate these plants.  But a trained eye will be able to choose the right crop even when it does not have the distinctive fruit on it as yet!

All men and women are not the same in character. Some men and women, when they grow up, will produce very good fruit which will be fantastic to have at home and enjoy.  Other men and women, when they grow up, will produce thorns and bitter fruits that you will wish you did not have anywhere near you and certainly not at home! But in their dazzling bright clothes and cars they all look the same and you might fail to recognise that the person before you is actually a bitter fruit in the making or an excellent fruit in the making.  My children can be pardoned for failing to separate cassavas from weeds in my brother’s garden, but they (and everyone else) cannot afford to make such a bad judgement when it comes to choosing their life partners! It will be too costly. So how can we see well enough so that we can choose right?

Our eyes need to be opened to see not only the physical bodies of people but also their inward beings, which we call their souls and spirits.  How can this happen?

  1. Come to the Lord.

When you come to God through Jesus Christ, He will open your eyes. Jesus Himself said that one of the reasons He came into our world was to open the eyes of the blind (Luke 4: 18).  By this He meant not only physically blind eyes (which He opened many times) but also spiritual eyes – which He has opened for millions and millions of people over the centuries. “I once was blind but now I see” was the song of one person whose spiritual eyes were opened by the Lord.

When you pray and ask Him, He will open your eyes.

  1. God’s word also helps us to separate yams from weeds:

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?  What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?  (2 Corinthians 6:14-16)

All men and women are NOT the same in character.  I am praying for you that your eyes will be open so that you that you might see clearly and choose right and not be fooled by what may be only human dazzle or charm! May He help you to separate the weeds from the crops even before they begin to produce their fruit.

adidas shoes for women dancers irish

adidas shoes for women dancers irish