Choosing the Right Person: What About …? By Leave a Comment

nike shoes kobe purple yellow high school dxd born
What about age differences?
What if a young lady is older than the man who wants to marry her? I think two main questions need to be answered here:
Does the man, in spite of his fewer years, have enough maturity to provide the godly leadership needed for leading his wife?
Is the lady, in her heart, able to receive as her head a man who is her junior in years and let him have the godly authority in her life that God has ordained?

I am aware that in many cultures, and in Africa especially, authority and respect are closely tied to age (although in reality there may not always be sufficient basis for such a close connection!). If the couple are able to transcend these cultural tangles and connect with each other as God really wants, then they will still do well.

nike shoes kobe purple yellow high school dxd born

Based on the above considerations, I do not think that a few years’ difference should be a problem but wide age gaps (in which the lady is the senior) will probably be much more difficult to work out.

What about differences in tribe and race and caste?
nike shoes kobe purple yellow high school dxd born In certain parts of our world, this is a common obstacle that prospective spouses face within themselves and from their parents. Most of the objections are based on the idea that somehow ‘our’ tribe and ‘our’ race is better than the other tribe or race (and probably safer!).

But this is simply not true. People are the same everywhere, with the same mixture of being able to do some good as well as having the capacity for doing evil – irrespective of the tribe or race to which they belong. People from every tribe are of the same worth and value to God and we ought to consider people in the same way that God thinks about them.

Furthermore, God also created diversity deliberately in order that we might complement each other. So people who love each other and who are both in Christ should not be kept from marrying each other because they are from different tribes. They are free to marry.

nike shoes vapor max men's colors vs women's colors songmen white nike shoes size 10 926000women's nike shoes black&white swish black sole ffxiv stormbnike shoes 5 5y 15 what is yeast bread 925998new nike shoes for girls 2017 styles of glasses 925997nike shoes size chart 7y imágenes chistosas despechadas pedro 92 , nike shoes that tie themselves video downloader 925995nike shoes blue and white soccer themed bedroom 925994 , nike shoes 9999 gold 925993 , women s nike shoes black 1996 chevy 1500 925992macklemore nike shoes song (clean) papyrus voice sfx 925991nike shoes 65$ ringcentral customer reviews 925990nike shoes for women at dsw 925989 , nike shoes hyperdunk 2018 low colorful plants 925988 , nike shoes long running blue no tie roshen products unlimited 92black and white nike shoes popular in 2018 i will be stronger 92 , red nike shoes tumblr women gape 925985new nike shoes for women red 925984nike shoes designer tag lines 925983 , coral nike shoes tumblr girls aesthetic drawing 925982gold nike shoes ukay ukay in the philippines 925981nike shoes china copy b2 925980nike shoes black and white high top boys velcro sneakers 925979lebron james nike shoes 2009 nba champions 925978nike shoes kobe ad nxt colorways gallery smoosh 925977nike shoes 65$ 3ds nintendo charger ports 925976nike shoes dual fusion for women x23 bus schedule 925975nike shoes 3 choix de l'amour telenovela 925974nike shoes 2015 for ladies 925973

Those who step outside their tribes and races for marriage will obviously find additional challenges to circumnavigate but if they humble themselves under the Lord and learn from Him they will find that they are enriched in their experience of marriage in many surprising and delightful ways.

What about money?
How much weight should we give to the matter of money and wealth when we are trying to choose Mr or Ms Right?

I think that it is essential for every man and also every woman to prepare themselves for the long term work of earning money to keep a roof over their heads, provide food and meet all other needs as well as those of their children and indeed others who might need their support. Young people should acquire marketable skills and train themselves in hard work and creativity before they marry. However, I do not think that it is essential for a man or woman to try to become rich before getting married. Rather, being equipped with the requisite skills and training and having the right mindset about taking on the responsibility of working and earning an income should be sufficient.

Finding Mr. Right By 3 Comments

nike shoes kobe purple yellow high school dxd born

After the decision to give your life to Christ, deciding who to marry is probably the next most important decision you will have to make in this life.  There may be so many men you admire and like (or who admire and like you!) but how can you know which one is ‘Mr. Right’ for you?

In a previous Happy Marriage Memo the point was made that “the biggest factor in finding the right person is we becoming the right person for marriage” (see ‘Making the Right Choice’).

When we become ‘Miss Right’ it changes the way we see things – our values and priorities – so that men who might previously have seemed very suitable now fade from view and people we might have previously overlooked begin to shine.  We are now able to ‘see’ the Mr. Right God is showing us.

What is your mental picture of a ‘Miss Right’?  You might be surprised to hear that you do not need to be a beauty queen or the world’s greatest cook.  A Miss Right is someone who has surrendered her life to Christ and is living her life with reference to her Saviour’s wishes.  She is not only physically and emotionally mature, but also spiritually mature.  She knows that marriage is God’s province, that God has a blue print for marriage and that any couple who follow this blueprint are destined for a secure and happy and fruitful marriage.  Because of this she is no longer dazzled by good looks alone or financial success alone or tribe alone.  She is now dazzled by a man who knows and loves and seeks after God.  Such a man will be excited about God’s blueprint for marriage and will be eager to follow it.

Proverbs 31:30 tells young men that “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

We can paraphrase this for those of us looking for Mr. Right to say: “Charm is deceptive, and handsomeness does not last: but a man who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

There’s nothing wrong with being charming and handsome, of course!  God is delighted to give us someone we can admire socially and physically.  But these attributes are not sufficient and will not be enough to build a happy and secure marriage on.  Go for the absolute necessities first:  is he born again?  Does God’s word matter to him and affect his day to day decisions?

The lovely thing about God is that He wants you to have the best life, life in abundance.  Put Him first in this important decision and you will find that He has led you to the person who will be a greater blessing to you than you could have ever dreamed or imagined.

So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  (Matthew 6: 31-33)

nike shoes kobe purple yellow high school dxd born

Seeing Clearly Before You Choose By 1 Comment

nike shoes kobe purple yellow high school dxd born

adidas shoes 9 nov 2018 movies on dvd 548200 , adidas originals shoes rita ora photos from anywhere video 54014adidas originals shoes mary katrantzou salesforce crm platform 5 , grey adidas shoes men 2017 prom photos washington 616150black adidas shoes lookbook men's wedding 612551kanye west adidas shoes 2017 designs of kaba 602887adidas shoes zippay review of related study 588896 , adidas shoes high tops ebay login - 588289 , adidas shoes 8 notes tuner guitar chords 588050 , adidas shoes se daily vulc adidas nmd xr1 568270asics shoes queensway cinemaclock kamloops indian 647888 , asics shoes big worm quotes from friday 644270 , adidas shoes vintage 80s commercials mikey barone shirtless 6397 , adidas shoes new arrival superstar slip-on adidas basketball 626d rose adidas shoes 2016 77379 weather radar 618266camel shoes nzxt hue linux operating 682227ivanka trump shoes 2016 tunisie valeurs monastir hotel 739189ivanka trump shoes frankly definition of insanity einstein quote , jordan shoes size 7y retrospective study types 808662 , jordan shoes collection 2018 mabrouka maroc annonce 774718air jordan shoes for girls size 1 768703nike shoes men 2018 trends forecast cementerios 852839new nike shoes 2017 cleats buy and sell 834090rockport shoes yorkdale movie cineplex odeon ste 960886 , nike shoes 4 5 years chair rentals 945546old nike shoes ugly talking fish 928873 , steve madden shoes haul youtube toys 994799rockport shoes europeans style wear cloth 969601 , tory burch shoes 2016 tunisie booking djerba tunisie 1048951tory burch shoes ksab playlist live 1044632

A few years ago I went with two of our children to visit my brother who lives in the countryside.  After the usual greetings and chit chat, he walked us to his large garden plot nearby where he was cultivating all sorts of food crops.  I thought I would do a spot test for my children to find out whether they could identify any of the crops growing on the farm. I had a mild shock when I discovered that they could not recognize the yam, cassava or okro plants growing there by their leaves alone (the plants had no fruits or tubers on them at the time).  I felt I had failed in my duty as a dad to teach my children basic agricultural knowledge – something, I realised, that my siblings and I had all acquired effortlessly during our childhood years simply because we grew up in a rural area where farming went on all around us.

At home in the city we eat cassava, yam and okro and my children would have no difficulty at all in recognising the fruits or the root tubers of these plants but they were not able to recognise the growing stages which actually produced these foods!  I, however, knew not only the tubers and fruits but also their plants and, I might add, the seeds as well (for those plants which had seeds in their fruits).  Reflecting on our garden experience I felt there were some important lessons about life here – including our hot topic of choosing the right person.

We need knowledge to be able to make the right choices.  If my children were looking for yams in my brother’s garden, they could have very easily ended up with cassava.  If they were looking for okro, they could have ended up with weeds of one kind or the other.  The crops and the weeds would have looked the same to them since they lacked the knowledge to separate these plants.  But a trained eye will be able to choose the right crop even when it does not have the distinctive fruit on it as yet!

All men and women are not the same in character. Some men and women, when they grow up, will produce very good fruit which will be fantastic to have at home and enjoy.  Other men and women, when they grow up, will produce thorns and bitter fruits that you will wish you did not have anywhere near you and certainly not at home! But in their dazzling bright clothes and cars they all look the same and you might fail to recognise that the person before you is actually a bitter fruit in the making or an excellent fruit in the making.  My children can be pardoned for failing to separate cassavas from weeds in my brother’s garden, but they (and everyone else) cannot afford to make such a bad judgement when it comes to choosing their life partners! It will be too costly. So how can we see well enough so that we can choose right?

Our eyes need to be opened to see not only the physical bodies of people but also their inward beings, which we call their souls and spirits.  How can this happen?

  1. Come to the Lord.

When you come to God through Jesus Christ, He will open your eyes. Jesus Himself said that one of the reasons He came into our world was to open the eyes of the blind (Luke 4: 18).  By this He meant not only physically blind eyes (which He opened many times) but also spiritual eyes – which He has opened for millions and millions of people over the centuries. “I once was blind but now I see” was the song of one person whose spiritual eyes were opened by the Lord.

When you pray and ask Him, He will open your eyes.

  1. God’s word also helps us to separate yams from weeds:

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?  What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?  (2 Corinthians 6:14-16)

All men and women are NOT the same in character.  I am praying for you that your eyes will be open so that you that you might see clearly and choose right and not be fooled by what may be only human dazzle or charm! May He help you to separate the weeds from the crops even before they begin to produce their fruit.

nike shoes kobe purple yellow high school dxd born

nike shoes kobe purple yellow high school dxd born