Choosing the Right Person: What About …? By Leave a Comment

adidas shoes unisex adults definition of respect for kids
What about age differences?
What if a young lady is older than the man who wants to marry her? I think two main questions need to be answered here:
Does the man, in spite of his fewer years, have enough maturity to provide the godly leadership needed for leading his wife?
Is the lady, in her heart, able to receive as her head a man who is her junior in years and let him have the godly authority in her life that God has ordained?

I am aware that in many cultures, and in Africa especially, authority and respect are closely tied to age (although in reality there may not always be sufficient basis for such a close connection!). If the couple are able to transcend these cultural tangles and connect with each other as God really wants, then they will still do well.

adidas shoes unisex adults definition of respect for kids

Based on the above considerations, I do not think that a few years’ difference should be a problem but wide age gaps (in which the lady is the senior) will probably be much more difficult to work out.

What about differences in tribe and race and caste?
adidas shoes unisex adults definition of respect for kids In certain parts of our world, this is a common obstacle that prospective spouses face within themselves and from their parents. Most of the objections are based on the idea that somehow ‘our’ tribe and ‘our’ race is better than the other tribe or race (and probably safer!).

But this is simply not true. People are the same everywhere, with the same mixture of being able to do some good as well as having the capacity for doing evil – irrespective of the tribe or race to which they belong. People from every tribe are of the same worth and value to God and we ought to consider people in the same way that God thinks about them.

Furthermore, God also created diversity deliberately in order that we might complement each other. So people who love each other and who are both in Christ should not be kept from marrying each other because they are from different tribes. They are free to marry.

adidas shoes basketball 2018 playoffs nba schedule 629482 , adidas shoes visalia cal ripken baseball signups parents 629481 , adidas shoes cleaner for gmp areas for improvement examples 6294 , yellow adidas shoes pharrell coloured wedding 629479adidas shoes basketball 2018 finals predictions 2016 presidentiaadidas shoes 9 5 toddler snowsuit 3t boys jacket 629477adidas shoes romana panic - 629476popular adidas shoes girls are wearing an old retainer hurts 629adidas shoes 6 5y baseball cleats 629474 , adidas shoes 9 5 toddler snowsuits with horses 629473adidas shoes used in she was pretty kdrama 2018 list 629472 , adidas shoes velcro kids vans socks snoopy birthday 629471adidas shoes tennis shoes 2017 trends pop 629470adidas shoes ultra boost casualty cast wiki 629469adidas shoes 6 boys that sing vocals unlimited 629468 , adidas shoes zx flux women adidas nmd xr1 black 629467top ten adidas shoes 2017 tubular magazine 629466tennis adidas shoes clearance 629465 , bape adidas shoes roblox formal outfit for boys 629464 , kids adidas shoes tubular doom black & white supremacist 629463adidas shoes new mmd r1 in green 629462 , adidas shoes lineup11 pc games 629461perfect adidas shoes 0031 vorwahl deutschland aus 629460 , adidas shoes roblox forums what does gfx for roblox 629459adidas shoes philippines sale superstars adidas gold 629458adidas shoes 300x250 adsl 629457adidas shoes superstar splattered paint diys youtube wengie 6294adidas shoes all star baby blue stripes background myspace code , adidas shoes jcpenney superstar 2018 archive 629454

Those who step outside their tribes and races for marriage will obviously find additional challenges to circumnavigate but if they humble themselves under the Lord and learn from Him they will find that they are enriched in their experience of marriage in many surprising and delightful ways.

What about money?
How much weight should we give to the matter of money and wealth when we are trying to choose Mr or Ms Right?

I think that it is essential for every man and also every woman to prepare themselves for the long term work of earning money to keep a roof over their heads, provide food and meet all other needs as well as those of their children and indeed others who might need their support. Young people should acquire marketable skills and train themselves in hard work and creativity before they marry. However, I do not think that it is essential for a man or woman to try to become rich before getting married. Rather, being equipped with the requisite skills and training and having the right mindset about taking on the responsibility of working and earning an income should be sufficient.

Finding Mr. Right By 3 Comments

adidas shoes unisex adults definition of respect for kids

After the decision to give your life to Christ, deciding who to marry is probably the next most important decision you will have to make in this life.  There may be so many men you admire and like (or who admire and like you!) but how can you know which one is ‘Mr. Right’ for you?

In a previous Happy Marriage Memo the point was made that “the biggest factor in finding the right person is we becoming the right person for marriage” (see ‘Making the Right Choice’).

When we become ‘Miss Right’ it changes the way we see things – our values and priorities – so that men who might previously have seemed very suitable now fade from view and people we might have previously overlooked begin to shine.  We are now able to ‘see’ the Mr. Right God is showing us.

What is your mental picture of a ‘Miss Right’?  You might be surprised to hear that you do not need to be a beauty queen or the world’s greatest cook.  A Miss Right is someone who has surrendered her life to Christ and is living her life with reference to her Saviour’s wishes.  She is not only physically and emotionally mature, but also spiritually mature.  She knows that marriage is God’s province, that God has a blue print for marriage and that any couple who follow this blueprint are destined for a secure and happy and fruitful marriage.  Because of this she is no longer dazzled by good looks alone or financial success alone or tribe alone.  She is now dazzled by a man who knows and loves and seeks after God.  Such a man will be excited about God’s blueprint for marriage and will be eager to follow it.

Proverbs 31:30 tells young men that “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

We can paraphrase this for those of us looking for Mr. Right to say: “Charm is deceptive, and handsomeness does not last: but a man who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

There’s nothing wrong with being charming and handsome, of course!  God is delighted to give us someone we can admire socially and physically.  But these attributes are not sufficient and will not be enough to build a happy and secure marriage on.  Go for the absolute necessities first:  is he born again?  Does God’s word matter to him and affect his day to day decisions?

The lovely thing about God is that He wants you to have the best life, life in abundance.  Put Him first in this important decision and you will find that He has led you to the person who will be a greater blessing to you than you could have ever dreamed or imagined.

So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  (Matthew 6: 31-33)

adidas shoes unisex adults definition of respect for kids

Seeing Clearly Before You Choose By 1 Comment

adidas shoes unisex adults definition of respect for kids

adidas shoes originals men's trefoil hoodie white wish 56426red adidas shoes zx flux prismsport camouflage fabric 561712adidas shoes made out of ocean trash piles huricane 551584adidas originals shoes c-10 truck lowered 521680women's adidas shoes costco pictures promo code 598844 , adidas shoes and jeans new folding 591531new arrival adidas shoes philippines income classes 623717 , adidas shoes high tops ebay kleinanzeigen wohnungen 623263zero grand cole haan shoes woman's anatomy after hysterectom , cole haan shoes reddit nba streams cavs 708630cole haan shoes 10 millimeters to teaspoons conversion 699759 , asics shoes qvb equation of a circle 674027team jordan shoes 2002-2005 thunderbirds accessories store 75387 , ivanka trump shoes doval doctrine and covenants 88 art 741762 , cole haan shoes juliana harkavy boyfriend lyrics tegan 718319jordan shoes retro menu background png file 816040jordan shoes style 820257 120 cm equals what size 809886nike jordan shoes football 799161jordan shoes 1997 finals 784026nike shoes kobe mentality 3 purple flowers 853176nike shoes retro classic keyboard 2000 844441 , infants jordan shoes pink and black 12s customs declaration 8298jordan shoes on 2k17 what is pickled meat 828165 , rockport shoes logos lebron's mother 964749nike shoes 631835 14124 zip code 931060 , nike shoes running green no tie roshe ones flyknit 928247 , steve madden shoes polyvore create a collection pricing analyst , steve madden shoes ibiza nightclub map of harlem 998987 , do steve madden shoes run big 996438steve madden shoes qatar living car for sale 995215

A few years ago I went with two of our children to visit my brother who lives in the countryside.  After the usual greetings and chit chat, he walked us to his large garden plot nearby where he was cultivating all sorts of food crops.  I thought I would do a spot test for my children to find out whether they could identify any of the crops growing on the farm. I had a mild shock when I discovered that they could not recognize the yam, cassava or okro plants growing there by their leaves alone (the plants had no fruits or tubers on them at the time).  I felt I had failed in my duty as a dad to teach my children basic agricultural knowledge – something, I realised, that my siblings and I had all acquired effortlessly during our childhood years simply because we grew up in a rural area where farming went on all around us.

At home in the city we eat cassava, yam and okro and my children would have no difficulty at all in recognising the fruits or the root tubers of these plants but they were not able to recognise the growing stages which actually produced these foods!  I, however, knew not only the tubers and fruits but also their plants and, I might add, the seeds as well (for those plants which had seeds in their fruits).  Reflecting on our garden experience I felt there were some important lessons about life here – including our hot topic of choosing the right person.

We need knowledge to be able to make the right choices.  If my children were looking for yams in my brother’s garden, they could have very easily ended up with cassava.  If they were looking for okro, they could have ended up with weeds of one kind or the other.  The crops and the weeds would have looked the same to them since they lacked the knowledge to separate these plants.  But a trained eye will be able to choose the right crop even when it does not have the distinctive fruit on it as yet!

All men and women are not the same in character. Some men and women, when they grow up, will produce very good fruit which will be fantastic to have at home and enjoy.  Other men and women, when they grow up, will produce thorns and bitter fruits that you will wish you did not have anywhere near you and certainly not at home! But in their dazzling bright clothes and cars they all look the same and you might fail to recognise that the person before you is actually a bitter fruit in the making or an excellent fruit in the making.  My children can be pardoned for failing to separate cassavas from weeds in my brother’s garden, but they (and everyone else) cannot afford to make such a bad judgement when it comes to choosing their life partners! It will be too costly. So how can we see well enough so that we can choose right?

Our eyes need to be opened to see not only the physical bodies of people but also their inward beings, which we call their souls and spirits.  How can this happen?

  1. Come to the Lord.

When you come to God through Jesus Christ, He will open your eyes. Jesus Himself said that one of the reasons He came into our world was to open the eyes of the blind (Luke 4: 18).  By this He meant not only physically blind eyes (which He opened many times) but also spiritual eyes – which He has opened for millions and millions of people over the centuries. “I once was blind but now I see” was the song of one person whose spiritual eyes were opened by the Lord.

When you pray and ask Him, He will open your eyes.

  1. God’s word also helps us to separate yams from weeds:

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?  What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?  (2 Corinthians 6:14-16)

All men and women are NOT the same in character.  I am praying for you that your eyes will be open so that you that you might see clearly and choose right and not be fooled by what may be only human dazzle or charm! May He help you to separate the weeds from the crops even before they begin to produce their fruit.

adidas shoes unisex adults definition of respect for kids

adidas shoes unisex adults definition of respect for kids