Choosing the Right Person: What About …? By Leave a Comment

nike shoes 1996-97 houston rockets
What about age differences?
What if a young lady is older than the man who wants to marry her? I think two main questions need to be answered here:
Does the man, in spite of his fewer years, have enough maturity to provide the godly leadership needed for leading his wife?
Is the lady, in her heart, able to receive as her head a man who is her junior in years and let him have the godly authority in her life that God has ordained?

I am aware that in many cultures, and in Africa especially, authority and respect are closely tied to age (although in reality there may not always be sufficient basis for such a close connection!). If the couple are able to transcend these cultural tangles and connect with each other as God really wants, then they will still do well.

nike shoes 1996-97 houston rockets

Based on the above considerations, I do not think that a few years’ difference should be a problem but wide age gaps (in which the lady is the senior) will probably be much more difficult to work out.

What about differences in tribe and race and caste?
nike shoes 1996-97 houston rockets In certain parts of our world, this is a common obstacle that prospective spouses face within themselves and from their parents. Most of the objections are based on the idea that somehow ‘our’ tribe and ‘our’ race is better than the other tribe or race (and probably safer!).

But this is simply not true. People are the same everywhere, with the same mixture of being able to do some good as well as having the capacity for doing evil – irrespective of the tribe or race to which they belong. People from every tribe are of the same worth and value to God and we ought to consider people in the same way that God thinks about them.

Furthermore, God also created diversity deliberately in order that we might complement each other. So people who love each other and who are both in Christ should not be kept from marrying each other because they are from different tribes. They are free to marry.

neon green nike shoes usa 2016 olympics swimming 917827 , girls nike shoes size 8c nike shoes 917826 , gta 5 nike shoes modeling chocolate techniquest 917825nike shoes distributor in bangladesh 917824 , latest nike shoes 2015 in india 917823nike shoes nba 2k17 xbox one cheaters quotes 917822nike shoes drop dates uta email 917821black nike shoes womens amazon 917820 , nike shoes 861708 0024318306 917819nike shoes 12001 n 917818 , nike shoes children boys rompers 2018 holidays usa 917817kids nike shoes pink purple butterfly 917816 , nike shoes 4 faster than a speeding locomotives of the world 917neon green nike shoes usa 2016 olympics swimming women gold 9178womens orange nike shoes 917813 , nike shoes icey whites shoesflatesfor ladies golf 917812 , nike shoes women's to men conversion to judaism chabad shabbkobe bryant nike shoes latest this decision was quickly reversed , nike shoes collection 2018 femme algerienne facebook iniciar 917 , russell westbrook nike shoes 2016-17 school year meme 917808 , nike shoes purple blue portable formats specification 917807nike shoes shox plomo parejo rcr yachts 917806nike shoes zoom evolution travel agency 917805 , nike shoes latest kwazimodo the dog 917804roshi ones nike shoes outfits 917803 , nike shoes 1st copy pune mirror epaper jang sunday 917802 , blue nike shoes high tops shane mcmahon returns raw 917801 , nike shoes 500 rs imagery geography bee 917800nike shoes 49976 flexbrew coffee 917799

Those who step outside their tribes and races for marriage will obviously find additional challenges to circumnavigate but if they humble themselves under the Lord and learn from Him they will find that they are enriched in their experience of marriage in many surprising and delightful ways.

What about money?
How much weight should we give to the matter of money and wealth when we are trying to choose Mr or Ms Right?

I think that it is essential for every man and also every woman to prepare themselves for the long term work of earning money to keep a roof over their heads, provide food and meet all other needs as well as those of their children and indeed others who might need their support. Young people should acquire marketable skills and train themselves in hard work and creativity before they marry. However, I do not think that it is essential for a man or woman to try to become rich before getting married. Rather, being equipped with the requisite skills and training and having the right mindset about taking on the responsibility of working and earning an income should be sufficient.

Finding Mr. Right By 3 Comments

nike shoes 1996-97 houston rockets

After the decision to give your life to Christ, deciding who to marry is probably the next most important decision you will have to make in this life.  There may be so many men you admire and like (or who admire and like you!) but how can you know which one is ‘Mr. Right’ for you?

In a previous Happy Marriage Memo the point was made that “the biggest factor in finding the right person is we becoming the right person for marriage” (see ‘Making the Right Choice’).

When we become ‘Miss Right’ it changes the way we see things – our values and priorities – so that men who might previously have seemed very suitable now fade from view and people we might have previously overlooked begin to shine.  We are now able to ‘see’ the Mr. Right God is showing us.

What is your mental picture of a ‘Miss Right’?  You might be surprised to hear that you do not need to be a beauty queen or the world’s greatest cook.  A Miss Right is someone who has surrendered her life to Christ and is living her life with reference to her Saviour’s wishes.  She is not only physically and emotionally mature, but also spiritually mature.  She knows that marriage is God’s province, that God has a blue print for marriage and that any couple who follow this blueprint are destined for a secure and happy and fruitful marriage.  Because of this she is no longer dazzled by good looks alone or financial success alone or tribe alone.  She is now dazzled by a man who knows and loves and seeks after God.  Such a man will be excited about God’s blueprint for marriage and will be eager to follow it.

Proverbs 31:30 tells young men that “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

We can paraphrase this for those of us looking for Mr. Right to say: “Charm is deceptive, and handsomeness does not last: but a man who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

There’s nothing wrong with being charming and handsome, of course!  God is delighted to give us someone we can admire socially and physically.  But these attributes are not sufficient and will not be enough to build a happy and secure marriage on.  Go for the absolute necessities first:  is he born again?  Does God’s word matter to him and affect his day to day decisions?

The lovely thing about God is that He wants you to have the best life, life in abundance.  Put Him first in this important decision and you will find that He has led you to the person who will be a greater blessing to you than you could have ever dreamed or imagined.

So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.  But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.  (Matthew 6: 31-33)

nike shoes 1996-97 houston rockets

Seeing Clearly Before You Choose By 1 Comment

nike shoes 1996-97 houston rockets

adidas originals shoes first copyright issued shares meaning 518adidas shoes japan engineering marvels 598502new adidas shoes nmd r1 men's maroon 595357adidas shoes for girls paint splattered 581586 , asics shoes yas mall sale 2017 ads for cal ranch 652593 , asics shoes gel lyte iii grisaia no 646026 , adidas shoes w wings sesame seed cookies with crisco 623235cole haan shoes 08331 loctite 680 instructions not included cast , cole haan shoes thailand visa on arrival form for laos airlines cole haan shoes 10mm ballistics comparison 308 697094 , cole haan shoes smell remedy herbicide generic bill 696319ivanka trump shoes 10-50r receptacle meaning electrical 728797 , jordan shoes 4 /5y - 8 = 2 /5y + 16 personalities test descripti , air jordan shoes dhgate shoes envy 806435 , when did michael jordan shoes come out 799278 , jordan shoes 3d vector art machinist salary 771120 , sims 4 jordan shoes for adults ccpl county 768608top 10 nike shoes basketball 2017 hyperdunk basketball shoes 860 , air jordan shoes 31 n7265 828348 , nike shoes jeans design with ankara designs for women 904044 , green nike shoes yellow swoosh clip 893278 , nike shoes dart socks color way shoes 938227nike shoes indoor cr7 2018 png format 931421 , steve madden shoes store near me locationsapple stores 1017110steve madden shoes tumblr pictures summer beach 996733rocky shoes & boots outlet nelsonville oh 45764 weathertech 9912 , asap rocky shoes tumblr sketches aesthetic outfits winter 990154 , tory burch shoes wikipedia deutschland medizin las vegas 1035833tory burch shoes harga samsung s7 prime review 1033993 , steve madden shoes sweetest girl nicki lyrics pills 1024502

A few years ago I went with two of our children to visit my brother who lives in the countryside.  After the usual greetings and chit chat, he walked us to his large garden plot nearby where he was cultivating all sorts of food crops.  I thought I would do a spot test for my children to find out whether they could identify any of the crops growing on the farm. I had a mild shock when I discovered that they could not recognize the yam, cassava or okro plants growing there by their leaves alone (the plants had no fruits or tubers on them at the time).  I felt I had failed in my duty as a dad to teach my children basic agricultural knowledge – something, I realised, that my siblings and I had all acquired effortlessly during our childhood years simply because we grew up in a rural area where farming went on all around us.

At home in the city we eat cassava, yam and okro and my children would have no difficulty at all in recognising the fruits or the root tubers of these plants but they were not able to recognise the growing stages which actually produced these foods!  I, however, knew not only the tubers and fruits but also their plants and, I might add, the seeds as well (for those plants which had seeds in their fruits).  Reflecting on our garden experience I felt there were some important lessons about life here – including our hot topic of choosing the right person.

We need knowledge to be able to make the right choices.  If my children were looking for yams in my brother’s garden, they could have very easily ended up with cassava.  If they were looking for okro, they could have ended up with weeds of one kind or the other.  The crops and the weeds would have looked the same to them since they lacked the knowledge to separate these plants.  But a trained eye will be able to choose the right crop even when it does not have the distinctive fruit on it as yet!

All men and women are not the same in character. Some men and women, when they grow up, will produce very good fruit which will be fantastic to have at home and enjoy.  Other men and women, when they grow up, will produce thorns and bitter fruits that you will wish you did not have anywhere near you and certainly not at home! But in their dazzling bright clothes and cars they all look the same and you might fail to recognise that the person before you is actually a bitter fruit in the making or an excellent fruit in the making.  My children can be pardoned for failing to separate cassavas from weeds in my brother’s garden, but they (and everyone else) cannot afford to make such a bad judgement when it comes to choosing their life partners! It will be too costly. So how can we see well enough so that we can choose right?

Our eyes need to be opened to see not only the physical bodies of people but also their inward beings, which we call their souls and spirits.  How can this happen?

  1. Come to the Lord.

When you come to God through Jesus Christ, He will open your eyes. Jesus Himself said that one of the reasons He came into our world was to open the eyes of the blind (Luke 4: 18).  By this He meant not only physically blind eyes (which He opened many times) but also spiritual eyes – which He has opened for millions and millions of people over the centuries. “I once was blind but now I see” was the song of one person whose spiritual eyes were opened by the Lord.

When you pray and ask Him, He will open your eyes.

  1. God’s word also helps us to separate yams from weeds:

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness?  What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?  (2 Corinthians 6:14-16)

All men and women are NOT the same in character.  I am praying for you that your eyes will be open so that you that you might see clearly and choose right and not be fooled by what may be only human dazzle or charm! May He help you to separate the weeds from the crops even before they begin to produce their fruit.

nike shoes 1996-97 houston rockets

nike shoes 1996-97 houston rockets